control Archives - The Goalden Lady

Success Has No Timeline

It seems that success is supposed to come by the time you’re 30. We should have settled into the big house, with the perfect spouse and the fantastic career.

While this may be someone’s reality, it doesn’t happen that way for most of us. Somewhere down the line, someone convinced you that “having it all” was supposed to come before you turn a certain age.

For others, it’s the direct opposite. While “having it all” is very possible, there is no particular time you should be concerned with when it comes to reaching your goals.

Compare Yourself, To Yourself

Why is your friend successful, but you’re still struggling? Who keeps watering the grass on the other side, so it’s greener? What is it that you’re doing so wrong?

There’s one answer to those questions and others like it – it’s none of your business. When you constantly compare your life to others, it’s always wrong.

When you begin comparing your life’s journey with someone else’s, that’s where you lose. Everyone else will always look better and have more than you. “Perfection” is never within your reach.

Some of us are born with advantages, some of us aren’t. Some of us have both parents living at home, some of us only have one. Some of us are millionaires by the age of 25, some of us by 55.

The point is, life is different for everyone. Each and every person’s journey is unique – there are no 2 lives on the planet Earth that happens exactly alike. Build right where you are, using what you already have.

Their life is so perfect – “why am I so far behind?” If you’re putting in the work, doing the best you can do, your achievement isn’t far away. Don’t measure how successful you are, using someone else’s ruler. Your own efforts will put you right where you need to be.

Focus on what’s in front of you, not what’s happening with someone else. Success doesn’t come to you, when you’re looking at other people. Again, do what you can, with what you have.

Where Is Your Focus?

Always look at what’s ahead in your life. Taking your eyes off of the prize (your goal) will surely slow you down. What someone else is doing doesn’t make your journey any less worth traveling.

Plan and prepare for what you want to do. Control what you can. You can only do this by betting on yourself and minding your own business.

When you look at what others are doing, you’re giving them the attention you should be giving yourself. You give them credit for what they’ve done, when you should actually be giving yourself credit for what you’ve accomplished.

We don’t see what other people do to become successful. They don’t tell you how hard it was, the friends they lost along the way or the sacrifice they made in order to reach their goal. All you see is what happened in the end.

Maybe they did something unthinkable to achieve what looks like a dream life – the whole point is, you don’t know. Instead of going through all of the guessing and assuming, focus on what you’re doing and how you’re going to be outstanding in your own life.

Success Will Come In Time

Concentrate on what you can do to make yourself a success. The world will open up to you when you begin to live your life. Don’t let your ego get in the way by thinking you have to keep up with someone else’s life, just to prove you’re worthy. You don’t have to prove anything to anyone.

It’s good to have people who inspire and motivate you, but don’t expect their success to be your success. You can follow the exact same blueprint of Serena Williams, but that won’t make you a champion within the same amount of time.

The only thing you can do is take responsibility for how hard you work. You have the power over how disciplined or resilient you can be. No one can put in the work for you – you must do that yourself.

Be inspired and motivated, but know that your success will come in your time, not theirs.

Don’t Find Yourself, Create Yourself

No one ever talks about how to create the person you want to become – it’s always about “finding” yourself. The way you use words matter and in this case, it can mean the difference between drifting through life and living intentionally.

What does it mean to “find” yourself? Have you been lost all this time? Is life already planned out, without your input? Would your thoughts and ideas even make a difference?

What Is “Finding” Yourself?

Life as a young adult can be an adventure. We have many options, depending on our situation – going to college, finding a job, sitting at home or just figuring things out.

There’s another option what some people like to call “finding” yourself. This phrase is mostly used when you don’t know what you’re doing, where you’re going or how you’re going to get there.

Fast forward five years and ask the person who was “finding” themselves what they are doing now. Some will have a story to tell, but most will still be stuck at figuring out who they are and what they want to do.

When you’re “finding” yourself, it implies that you’re lost. It seems like you must go somewhere and reclaim an identity that someone stole from you. There’s nothing lost about you – who you are is not randomly waiting for your surprise arrival.

Sometimes you’ll find things and sometimes you won’t. Do you want to take that chance in the peak of your life? Or, would you rather be deliberate about following a path that will lead you close to where you really want to be?

How To Create Yourself

Taking some time to “find” yourself should be phrased differently. We like to call it creating yourself (words matter).

Instead of “finding” yourself, create yourself. This gives the idea that you are in control of directing your life. “Finding” yourself happens by chance, but creating yourself happens with intention.

If you don’t know who you want to be, this is the perfect time to begin building a foundation for yourself. You get to develop quality standards and enhance certain habits, everyday.

Start by doing research on the person you admire most. Do they wake up early in the morning? Do they read ten books a month? Are they only working four hours a week? Where do they live? Do they work more than they sleep?

These are lifestyle habits that give you an idea of how to follow your own path. You don’t have to do everything single thing that they do, but it gives you a sense of building yourself. This is how we all start – we pull what we admire from others and piece it into our own lives.

At the same time, if there’s something that doesn’t work for you (like waking up every morning at 5am), don’t be afraid to change it. Make adjustments to your liking. Everyone’s blueprint isn’t the same. Some people are early risers and some are night owls.

This is where the creating comes in – this is you building yourself. If a certain routine doesn’t work for you, create another one. Take responsibility for your actions and decisions. Don’t be timid about making mistakes and experiencing failure – they only point you in the right direction.

Be Proud Of Your Progress

Eventually, creating yourself will put you on the right path to the life you want to live. Don’t just set out to “find” yourself, be intentional and have a purpose.

Be thoughtful about who you want to be and what you want to do. Don’t leave it up to the world to tell you who you are, CREATE who you are! The power is in your hands – you are the writer, director, actor/actress and the editor of your life’s movie.

Take what you already know and use it to your advantage to grow even more. The progress you make will inevitably lead you to your success!

Take Control By Learning How To Respond

Life isn’t fair – we know this. Things happen out of our control and we allow our emotions to flow out of control, too.

This is not the way to respond – this is reacting. It’s not necessary to react every time something happens. How should you respond? Does it help remove all of the unfairness that life throws at you?

Responding vs. Reacting

When something unexpected happens, most people react. By reacting, it means to make it worse, or to add more drama to what’s happening. This isn’t a helpful way to solve a problem.

If there’s a car accident and someone gets hurt, how do you react? Or do you respond? Here’s the difference:

Reacting would be seeing someone who is seriously injured and telling them how bad it looks. You’re freaking out and screaming, as if you’re the one who’s hurt. The person who’s injured goes into an even deeper panic, as you point out how terrible everything looks.

As a person who responds, you would assess the situation, call 911 and calmly talk to the injured person. You let the person know that help is on the way and you talk to them in a positive manner. Everything is under control and the injured person finds comfort in the support that you provide.

Which person would you rather have assisting you in a time of need?

Control What You Can

Most times, your emotions will lead to an unintended place. People will determine how they will move forward with you, depending on how you react or respond.

Never worry about what you aren’t able to control. It’s fine to be concerned, but it’s best to be positive – there’s no need to think with a negative mindset.

When you worry, you’re robbing yourself of the present. The present is the only time you can choose what you do. Even then, it may not go your way, but you must learn to hold your composure and respond in the best way possible.

Reacting will cause stress and anxiety. Being emotionally “on” all of the time because something happened out of your control does nothing to help your situation. It leads to the wrong choices and drains your energy.

You Are In Control

Will responding, instead of reacting, take away all of the unfairness in life? It definitely won’t, but it will give you confidence over what you can control. If you develop confidence over what you can control, you’ll develop more confidence over what you aren’t able to control.

Make it a habit to respond as if the situation is happening to you – put the shoe on the other foot. Would you want someone making everything worse for you, or would you want them being helpful and encouraging?

No matter the outcome of the situation, the best part about it is that you were able to support someone in their time of need. Or, you were able to solve a problem so things could move forward more efficiently, without your emotions being a factor.

When given the chance, be productive and don’t allow your emotions to over rule logic. Take control and do something to help. Be of good service and support. Just remember to always remain calm and do the best you can to make the best of any situation. Don’t give your power to worrying.

Only you can change how you behave in any given circumstance. Will you become angry and fold, or will you think it through and continue to improve? Manage your emotions to your advantage, or it will become your greatest disadvantage.

#BeGoalden

Dealing With Stress Through Making Progress

Everyone goes through the stress of challenging times. It can take a toll on your mental and physical health. Stress and anxiety can cloud your outlook towards the sound solution you’re looking for.

People will tell you not to worry and to stay hopeful. This may be a good start, but don’t lean on it too much. There’s one thing they won’t encourage you to do.

The Victim Vortex

The unthinkable happens and you instantly begin to stress and go into, “I don’t know what to do,” mode. Without thinking, you begin to panic and everything seems to go downhill.

As you spiral out of control emotionally, you wish there was something that could save you from going deeper and deeper. The only thing that can save you is sleep, or some sort of vice.

This is the path to having a victim mentality. When you think like a victim, you feel like there’s no way out and all you can do is hope that someone will step in and save the day. At some point, you even feel like you deserve to be saved, yet, no one is paying attention.

Having a stress moment happens to everyone at one time or another. Some of us know how to handle it and move on – some of us allow it to carry us into an almost inescapable vortex, where we believe that everyone else owes us.

There’s Still Work To Be Done

As you look to family and friends for support, you’ll get everyone’s sympathy. No one wants to kick you while you’re down and that’s very considerate of them. At the same time, a plan needs to be created for your comeback.

Most people stay in the victim vortex, because it’s safe, even though they aren’t making progress. That type of negative energy is nearly impossible to escape.

On the other hand, it’s nice when everyone is on your side and so understanding. Everyone realizes that it wasn’t your fault and it’s horrible that this even happened to you.

What they don’t tell you is there’s still work to be done. Sitting and waiting for something to change in your favor is not going to cut it. You must get up and be productive. Climb your way out and create a plan, so you’re not caught off guard when it happens again. Something needs to push the train and that something is your effort.

At the time, you may not know what to do, but do something. You don’t know if you’ll run into someone with good information or if you’ll stumble across something on the internet. Attempt new things or go volunteer. You’ll never know where you’ll find your solution if you continue to sit still.

Overall, there’s things you can do, directly or indirectly, to help move the needle. Depending on others to do it for you will only dig you into a deeper hole. Find some courage, make some moves and save yourself!

Less Stress Makes More Progress

If you’re fortunate, you may have that one person who is forward-thinking and wants to push you to be more active towards your situation. That’s the person you need on your team, because they know you can do better and won’t offer pity. It’s difficult to find people who will give you that raw support you really need. Sympathy is nice, but it won’t provide the answer.

Instead of relying on someone else to improve your situation, work on improving it yourself. Having such a positive mindset during a challenging time is hard, but you can get through it.

Give yourself time to feel bad. Get your feelings out and then, get them under control. It may take a day or it may take a week, but give yourself a time frame where you’ll stop the pity party and start being productive.

Time doesn’t wait. One day you’ll look up and it’ll be next year – don’t be in the same place, still feeling sorry for yourself. Your emotions may draw you back every now and then, but have the confidence to pull yourself back into being active.

Most people don’t want to hear about progress when they’re stressed, but you don’t have to be those people. Success favors the bold and if you want to have a fulfilling life, do the things that will get you there. It’s your choice – do you want to stay comfortable, or grow into your greatness?

#BeGoalden

What’s The Excuse That’s Been Holding You Back?

Everyday, it’s a different excuse. You’re having a bad hair day, the dog got away or the storm knocked out the internet. Therefore, you won’t take action.

These may be valid reasons as to why you won’t do anything, but in reality, they’re not reasons, they’re excuses.

We can think of many reasons not to do anything productive. Deeper than that, we’ll allow it to make sense, so we won’t feel guilty about not following through. How can we do better?

Time Is Not An Excuse

One of the biggest excuses is not having enough time. We tell ourselves that millionaires are millionaires, because they have all the time in the world. “If I had that kind of time, I’d be rich, too,” we say.

Millionaires may be rich, but with the exception of those who were born rich, what were they doing with their time, prior to being rich? Were they sitting around, talking about why rich people are rich?

This is the part that no one talks about – the late nights and early mornings, making ends meet, putting in time with the kids, keeping up with awkward schedules, etc. For the most part, they were working towards their goals and they never gave up. You’ve heard stories of people who work on their side business for 4 hours, after they came home from working 2 jobs. There’s discipline in that type of work ethic and it pays off.

Remember when you never had the time? Well, it’s up to you to bend it to your benefit and leverage it as much as possible. It’s all the same 24 hours, so if you want it to work out, you have to make it work for you.

Our minds tend to keep us on a schedule of daily habits. If you want to have a chance at reaching your goal, enhance your routine. Stretch, adjust or eliminate the details in your daily pattern. Disrupt your autopilot habits and become more aware of the goal you’re trying to achieve.

You could shorten your time watching television and replace it with creating a plan. Maybe you could research while you eat dinner. Or, you could listen to a podcast while taking a shower.

There are many ways you can make more time – it just takes a little altering to make it work towards your advantage.

It’s Not In Your Control

Everything that happens in life is not controlled by you. If you can accept that simple fact, you’ll save yourself a lot of stress.

Some of us get upset when life happens – we become emotional and start having negative thoughts. Like a child, we have a tantrum and we let it stop us from doing what we planned to do.

Yes, this presents a challenge, but at the same time, you have the ability to think your way through it. There may be a change of plans that have to take place, but it can be done.

Some of the things we tell ourselves is, “It is what it is…” or “I’m not about to do that, just so I can do this…” We make up these ridiculous excuses to justify our laziness. Now, you’ve allowed the situation to hijack your progress.

It’s difficult to get up after being knocked down. It becomes comfortable to stay there, because it’s easier than getting knocked down again. Why even try? Get rid of this excuse – it only puts you on a path to nowhere.

Don’t let the things you’re unable to control, have control over you. Have a ‘can-do’ attitude when things happen unexpectedly. These are the small battles that need to be won, so that you can move closer to your results. It’s not the end, there’s just another way to do it.

How Do You Want This To End?

The easy part of this, is that you get to make the decision on the outcome you want to see. The hard part is, you must consistently get up and take action, if you want to get there.

If you were in a physical fight, it’s natural to defend yourself and fight back, because you want to win. You’re doing your best to prevent yourself from being hurt. It’s the same with accomplishing your goals. When an obstacle hits you, don’t just lay down and take it – get up and take another swing.

Use your mind in the right way. That involves thinking positive thoughts and creating a growth environment for yourself. Instead of lingering on the problem (challenge) at hand, linger on finding a solution. How you respond to a challenge determines if you’ll be successful or not.

Don’t make a convenient excuse – overcome them. Whether you create them or life creates them, don’t let them get in your way. You are more than capable of changing your direction in order to make it happen and win.

#BeGoalden

3 Negative Thought Patterns You Need To Avoid, Now!

There are 3 thought patterns that are certain to happen, when you are on the journey to self-improvement. No matter how hard you try to focus and stay on your path, they’ll pop up, just to keep you from advancing to the next level.

If you know what these patterns are, it’s easier to recognize them when they appear. Therefore, you can manage them, accordingly.

Thought Patterns To Break

You can’t change the past. The only time you should look in the past is to see how far you’ve come. The fact that you’ve overcome those obstacles is something to be very proud of. Hindsight is 20/20 – we all can look back and see how we could have done things better, but don’t get stuck there. Thinking about how things would’ve turned out different if you had finished college or married the nerd and not the bad boy, doesn’t help you right now. It’s impossible to change that. The only thing you can do now is move on and make better decisions that your future self will thank you for.
It’s not over until you quit. You are not a loser if you encounter a challenge. These things will happen and in order to breakthrough, you need to know how to handle them effectively. You only fail when you quit. How many times have we seen the scenario of the last second, game-winning shot? The impossible can happen when you don’t give up. Even if it doesn’t turn out in your favor, take it as a lesson and apply it the next time around. It’s not over until you say it’s over. Keep finding solutions and moving forward.
Other people’s judgment of you isn’t who you are. People who are jealous will show their insecurities by putting them on you. If they think they’re ugly, they’ll call you ugly. If they think they can’t succeed, they’ll call you a failure. Allowing that negativity to penetrate your mind will cause harm. When you hear someone being judgmental, discard it immediately. Don’t let it float around in your head because, eventually, you’ll start to believe it. Take compliments, but reject judgment.

What Do You Think, Literally?

Be protective of your mental state. The 3 things mentioned above can easily hijack the progress of your goal, so be aware.

Your environment is very important. Create the habit of having positive thoughts and people around you. It’s hard to remain positive, but it’s easy to slip into being negative.

Always read and listen to motivational platforms (blogs, podcast, videos, etc). Make your immediate surroundings full of encouragement and inspiration. Take care of your mindset to the point where it won’t be disturbed by anything distracting.

You may not be in control of what is around you at all times, but you are in control of your mind and how you use it. Your thoughts will create your future, so defend it to the fullest.

#BeGoalden

Control Your Chaos

Everything doesn’t go as planned in the real world. Reaching your goals is an incredible effort within itself. You don’t have to let everyone else know the chaos you’re going through.

People are happy to get in your business. Some wish you well, but others will make their way into it and stir up more drama. They want to see you sweat and worry over the possibility of something bad happening.

Things may be happening here and there and it seems like it’s getting out of hand, but this is your journey – no matter what happens, you’re still in control.

Here are a few suggestions to help you get through it:

Don’t blurt out how bad things are going for you. Don’t put your business out there. Keep your plans under wraps. There are some people who may be able to help, but for the most part, you’re giving others a front row seat to watch you fall apart (at least that’s what they’re hoping for). Move in silence and allow your success to do the talking.
Think it through. Instead of accepting the confusion and dancing with defeat, drink some water and think it through. Things may be going a little rough now, but once you think it through, it’ll work itself out (with your help, of course). Give it some thought and give it some time.
Remember: you are in control. Everyone goes through obstacles along the way – it’s inevitable. When it comes, that’s your chance to figure things out and get over it, not to crumble and walk away. Take this opportunity to learn a better way. Apply your knowledge and do the work. When you win one obstacle, it gives you confidence to take on the next one.

Others are expecting you to fail. It gives them a chance to say, “I told you so,” or to deflect the negative attention to you and away from them. They are waiting to see you with your head down, but always keep your head up – you’re the one making progress and that’s always something to be proud of!

The joke’s on them, because you know what to do in these situations. You won’t give them the satisfaction of watching you fall, because you won’t. You’ll just figure out another way that works. You’ll always come out on top.

It may be chaos, but you are the one in control. Control your chaos. Don’t let it overwhelm you – take it step by step. Adapt to what has happened and adjust your route. Change the path, not the goal.

This is what the road to success looks like. It’s not easy and it will break you down at times, but how else will you learn?

The chaos doesn’t give you permission to stop, but permission to keep going. Take control of your chaos.

#BeGoalden

Reacting vs. Responding

Let’s talk about reactions and responses. When there’s a situation, are you the person who reacts or responds? Being a responder is better than being a reactor. Let’s look at the example:

On your way home from work, there is a car accident that happens right before your eyes. The cars collided head on and no one, in either vehicle, is moving. You race from your car to the scene and try to assess the situation. You have called for help. This accident looks pretty bad, but you are talking to the victims, keeping them calm. You let them know that help is on the way and ask if there is anything you can do to help. The dispatcher tells you to keep the victims still, as much as possible. You are communicating back and forth with the victims and letting them know that everything is under control. There is light conversation between you all, until the ambulance arrives. They take over and the police is asking what happened and you calmly tell them what you saw.

Or, the story could go like this:

On your way home from work, there is a car accident, right before your eyes. The cars collided head on and no one, in either vehicle, is moving. You race from your car to get a closer look. “Oh, no! Look at all the blood,” you scream as you run between the two cars. “This is so bad — this is really bad. OMG! I hope you don’t die!” you exclaim. Meanwhile, the victims in the cars are crying and upset, as you run around, having a holy fit. “Somebody call for help!” one of the victims scream. “Where’s my phone?! I think I lost my phone!” you continue as you scramble around the scene. Fortunately, someone passing by has called for help. When the ambulance arrives, the victims are so emotional and confused that it’s hard to see what has happened. The police asks you questions, but he has to calm you down first. After fifteen minutes of chaos, you are calm enough to tell what happened, but now, it has all become a blur…

Between both of these stories, which one reacted and which one responded?

In the first story, you responded. You were efficient and you kept the victims calm. Your focus was completely on them and how to help the situation. It turned out well for everyone, therefore, making for better results.

In the second story, you reacted. You were frazzled and the victims were even more frazzled, after you freaked out. Nothing was done to comfort the victims and you focused more on yourself. Even though the victims were hurt, you let your emotions explode out of control, which only made them feel worse. This is what happens when your emotions take over.

As you can see, when you respond, you manage to handle the situation. Your emotions took a back seat to what was going on and you maintained a sense of normalcy, for the victims’ sake.

When you reacted, it only enhanced an already bad situation. Your emotions ballooned and your focus went out of the window, if there was any to begin with. The accident was bad, but you didn’t make it any better by announcing how bad it was and how awful it looked.

Being focused is always a strength. When you respond in any situation, it makes it easier to deal with. Even if you don’t know what you’re doing, it helps to remain calm and think things through.

Try not to overreact. It can be surprising when things happen out of the blue, but as in any situation, you must remain calm. This helps promote a productive outcome.

Next, with your emotions aside, figure out how to help. Keep your feelings to yourself, because it won’t make things better.

In most situations, the calmest person becomes the leader among everyone, simply because they are constructive and appear to be in control.

Excerpt from: The Goalden Lady Presents: Help! I’m Stuck: 10 Strategies To Push You Through To Achieving Success A Personal Development Series, Book 1 by S.R. Roberts

The Driver’s Seat

Photo by Samuele Errico Piccarini on Unsplash

When you’re young, you can’t wait to drive. The thought of having your own car and going anywhere you want to go becomes the most important thing in your life. This not only applies to driving, but it also applies to life.

Being in the driver’s seat is a big responsibility. You’re the one in control. If something happens, it could affect you and possibly others around you. Believe it or not, some days you may not even feel like driving, but like life, you have to drive to get to where you want to go.

As the driver of your life, you can go where ever you please. Your destination is in your hands. There will be bumps and potholes in the road, but you have to deal with them the best that you can. It may cause temporary damage to your car (life), but you need to deal with it if you want to go on.

Once your car has been fixed, you are more careful about those potholes. You may not be able to avoid them all, but you can avoid the same ones. In life, you learn from your mistakes. There will still be potholes you may not see, but if you hit one, you can handle it. You know how to avoid the same issues. When a new one arises, you have the determination to solve it.

If you want your car to last, you must maintain it. Doing things like washing your car, getting oil changes and rotating the tires are the simple things that will keep your car running efficiently. When you’re working towards your goal, there are things you can do to continue to be your best. You can read helpful books, exercise and eat right and manage your money wisely, among other things. Keeping up these simple maintenance routines will keep you on track.

While you’re driving, the car will automatically shift gears in order to go faster or slower. When things aren’t going your way, you will need to shift your gears and adjust and adapt to different circumstances. Whether it is an obstacle or an opportunity, have the flexibility to change your mind and go in a different direction, if need be. Even if you’re going in the wrong direction, know that you can turn around and take another route. Learn to shift your gears.

Being in the driver’s seat has it’s benefits. The potholes will come and most of the time, you won’t see them, but you have the mindset and skills to overcome it. When a car sits for a long time, it will not start. Don’t let that happen to you. Get up, keep moving and be open to new adventures on the road of life.

Why Worrying Won’t Work

When unpleasant challenges arise, the first thing most people do is worry. It’s a reaction that lives on autopilot in your mind, ready to go when needed. Not only does worrying affect you on the inside, it affects how you perceive things on the outside. Let’s see why worrying won’t work.

Don’t be a Worry Wart. What is a Worry Wart? As soon as something out of the basic routine happens, you begin to stress about it.

“What’s going to happen?”
“Why did it happen?”
“Who did this to me?”
“What am I going to do?”

All types of questions, along with several negative emotions, start to run rampant in your mind.

This raises your stress levels. You begin to attempt to answer those questions in your mind. Nothing is working out in your favor. Is there a number to call? Is there someone you can speak to about the situation?

You want answers because you simply don’t know why this is happening to you. Therefore, you just continue to worry because you don’t know what else to do.

Sometimes, it’s simply something that you, the Worry Wart, did to yourself that caused the issue. After that, you can’t be mad and stressed about it anymore. Take responsibility and deal with the consequences.

On the other hand, it may have been a mistake that needs to be corrected. You follow instructions on how to fix the flaw and it’s done. No more worrying because you resolved it.

In both cases, your mind went into a frenzy because you didn’t know what was going on. There’s a way to save yourself from the stress of worrying, but it takes practice.

When you receive bad news or something happens out of your control, talk to someone or simply do the research. Spazzing out doesn’t help and most of all, it won’t solve your issue.

When you get emotional about things you can’t control, it affects your surroundings, as well. You may take it out on the kids, friends, and you’re unpleasant to be around. You’re just an all around grump until you figure out what’s going on.

That’s the thing – figure out what’s going on. That’s what needs to happen. You’re only making it worse for yourself and those around you.

Learn to respond, instead of react.

When you let your emotions get the best of you, it normally doesn’t end well. Not only does being emotional make it worse, you’re also not solving anything. Nothing gets done.

It’s normal to have an initial emotional reaction. Don’t let it overtake you into worry world. Start thinking about what you can do to help the situation or to solve the issue. Do what you can. If you can’t control it at the moment, leave it alone until you’re able to figure it out.

When you respond, you come out with better results. It works out for you and those around you. Sometimes, you’re unable to do anything about certain situations until a period of time has passed. There’s no need to put yourself and others through hell because in the end, you could be worrying about nothing.

Worrying won’t help. It only takes up your precious time and for some, can even lead to health problems. Do what you can and be calm enough so you can resolve the issue. Decide to respond around your emotions and not in your emotions. If you do this, you’ll have a better handle on taking care of what needs to be done.