productivity Archives - The Goalden Lady

Dealing With Disappointment

Disappointment is one of those things you wish wouldn’t happen, but it always seems to find a way to rear it’s ugly head. Whether you find it coming from yourself or someone else, it has a way of disrupting your flow.

Unfortunately, disappointment is something we’re unable to avoid, but we do have the ability to work around it. Instead of trying to ignore it, be mindful and learn how to deal with it productively as possible.

What Disappoints You?

There are a million ways you can be disappointed. Deception, death, high expectations, sadness, anger, betrayal – it all falls under the umbrella of being disappointed. Whether something is unfair or not, it frustrates you.

It could be someone not showing up on time. Maybe you didn’t get the job you hoped for. Your best friend stole from you. Someone cut you off in traffic. There’s not as much money in your bank account as you thought.

Some of these disappointments are caused by other people, but some of it is caused by you. It’s important to know the difference, because you may not be able to fix other people, but you can definitely fix yourself.

Just know that other people are not you! Don’t expect them to do things the way you would do them – this is one of the easiest ways to disappoint yourself. Of course, we should all have high standards and expectations of each other, but in reality, it just doesn’t work that way.

Waking up in the morning to find there are no socks to wear can be disappointing, but you can fix that so it won’t happen again. Running out of gas while driving on the highway can make you mad, but you can fix that so it won’t happen again. These are situations that you bring upon yourself, but you can fix it. Be accountable and stop disappointing yourself.

Perspective

Think about this: do others upset you or do you allow yourself to be upset by them?

One way is blaming and the other is taking responsibility. People do crazy things – you don’t have to like it, but you don’t have to let it ruin your day, either. That’s life. You don’t have to be offended by every little thing. If you can see it from another perspective, it will help you move on with your day.

We can not stop disappointment from happening. However, it does contribute towards the building of our integrity and character. It can be annoying, but if you can see the situation from a different angle, it can possibly put you at an advantage.

Adjust your outlook so you won’t experience a high level of disappointment. It can be heartbreaking when someone lets you down, but don’t let it become distracting. Some of us are stuck on something that happened ten years ago. It’s hard to forgive and let go, but you don’t want to live in a mental prison all of your life.

Forgiveness is for you, not for them. It allows you to move forward so you can continue to make progress in your life. When you hold a grudge, the other person doesn’t feel it – you carry that burden of disappointment. If you shift your perspective, you’ll enjoy the benefit of controlling your emotions (not your emotions controlling you) and creating a more improved outcome.

It’s Okay To Feel Your Disappointment

When other things disappoint you, especially if it has nothing personal to do with you, let it go. Giving up your energy to silly things can be draining. It sounds simple in theory, but why do we make it hard to do?

Sometimes, it’s the small things that can get to us – someone looking at us the wrong way, it rained when it wasn’t supposed to or your favorite team lost the big game. These type of things will happen. You have no control over it, but you can make the choice to forget about it and keep going. Don’t carry it with you the rest of the day – unless there’s something you can do, accept it and let it go.

Other times, disappointment can be more personal and difficult to deal with. A loved one becomes terribly ill or your child is following the wrong crowd. Situations like these are unable to let go as easily. It may hurt everyday, but the best way to handle it is to be as helpful and as positive as you can.

With some disappointments, there is no concrete way of handling them – you just have to let it run it’s course and work itself out. At the same time, you don’t have to live in it. Acknowledge it, but allow yourself to look ahead and continue to pursue your future.

No matter what happens or how you feel, the world doesn’t stop. There are ways to limit your disappointments and deal with them in a productive way – just don’t let it ruin your life.

4 Tips To Planning Your Goal Effectively

We think up big and small goals on the regular. Anything from what we will eat in the morning to how we will plan for retirement. No goal is too great or insignificant, but it still involves mental and physical action to get the best outcome.

It seems like pursuing a goal should be as easy as moving forward with everything already in place, but it’s not magic. Your life is in your hands and the results come down to the basics of strategic planning and decisions.

Goal-Making Questions

Every goal should be actionable, but some will require deeper thought. Here are some goal-making questions to ask yourself:

What do you want? If you don’t know what you want, how will you get there? It’s a simple question, but a lot of people act without knowing exactly what they want. Knowing what you really want will give you the best possible results. Write it down, detail by detail.
How will you start? Some people believe you need to have all of the stars aligned before you can start. That’s not true – you simply start where you are, with what you have. Take note of your resources and figure out how to move the needle. Everyone doesn’t have the same advantage when starting – some will have more, some will have less, but you must make it a point to focus on yourself and start where you are. If you don’t, you’ll be in the same place as you were before.
What can you change? This is where a lot of people get stuck in life. They worry about things not going their way or some circumstances that didn’t turn out in their favor. Although you aren’t able to control what happens, you CAN control how you react and what to do moving forward. You can’t control everything, so learn to adapt and adjust. When you give up the anxiety and stress of worrying, you’ll quickly begin to see improvement.
What can I do to move it forward? Working on your goals and strategies takes focused work, but don’t forget to take some time and have a little fun. When you make time to take a break, you allow your mind to breathe and create more ideas and figure out challenges. Visualize and create your blueprint – improve it as you go along.

Productive Habits Will Get You There

It takes daily practice to drive yourself towards your dream. Prepare a set of helpful habits that will guide you into working on your goals daily. This helps out, even when you don’t “feel like” following through.

Self-improvement is a lifelong task. Having focus, discipline and resilience will make that journey a little easier. Once you accomplish one goal, there’s always a bigger and better one to go after. Put your goal in place with these tips and become the successful person that you visualize!

#BeGoalden

#TBT: How Creating Better Habits Can Prevent Future Problems

By not having strong habits in place, we can become our own worst enemy. Potential obstacles can be a challenge, but it can be handled effectively, beforehand, with the right effort.

Little things that we tend to overlook for too long, can become big distractions. If we aren’t careful, snowballs can become avalanches and spiral out of control.

Yet, some of it is in our control. There are many situations we can prevent from happening, but we must intentionally practice building our habits in a productive way.

Weak Habits Won’t Help

Building powerful habits can help you avoid falling into small, predictable traps. By procrastinating on the little things and putting them off, you forget about it and then it becomes a bigger issue that should have never happened.

Let’s take paying monthly bills, as an example. Most bills are due at the same time, every month. We know this, but we’re so used to the thought of it being due, that it slips our minds and we forget to pay it on time (or some of us just ignore it completely).

Before you know it, the lights have been turned off, due to our lack of attention. Now, we have to make phone calls and wait for the services to be restored. Late fees have to be paid and we may have to wait 3 business days before they can turn them back on.

Time and money have been lost, due to weak habits.

It Happens In All Areas Of Life

You know what needs to be done, but for whatever reason, you decide to procrastinate and do it later. It doesn’t just happen with bills – it happens in all areas of our lives.

The diet that was supposed to start today, doesn’t start because you didn’t prepare for it. You’re still eating entire pizzas and cheeseburgers for lunch and dinner. In your mind, you’ll start tomorrow, but you need just one more day.

Every weekend, you’re still shopping online and buying what you want. That’s fine for some people, but if you want to improve your life and you keep telling yourself that you’re going to save money, that’s not going to work.

How To Advance Your Habits

Everything seems simple in your mind, but it’s hard to do when it comes to taking action. If you want to make a change for the better, here’s what you need to do:

First, make the commitment. You’ve already done that part in your mind, but now, you must physically act on it. Your commitment to yourself should be held to a high standard. Give yourself consequences, if that helps. If you eat that doughnut, you must do 50 push ups. Think before you procrastinate.

Secondly, prep yourself. Put your bills on auto-pay. Get rid of the junk food in your house. Put internet controls on your computer to limit your lazy time. When you prep yourself, you put yourself in a better position to be successful.

Third, take action. Even if it’s not perfect action, do it anyway. The worst thing you can do is nothing at all. You learn along the way and get better as you go along. If you have to do it over, do it over, but don’t stop. Always move forward.

Always Think 2 Steps Ahead

Once you develop these productive habits and more, you’ll experience less of those ‘preventable’ situations. This part of your life can run on autopilot to your benefit.

Think prevention – what can I do so this won’t happen, again? Are there routines I can put in place to avoid these annoying interruptions? Figure it out before it happens.

By being a progressive thinker and action taker, you will be able to stay 2 steps ahead of the game. Reacting at the last minute, especially when you were capable of handling it earlier, places you in a better position to be more productive and ready.

Don’t wait for it to become a problem – position yourself to manage it ahead of time. When you think 2 steps ahead, you win back your money, time and energy.

#BeGoalden

#TBT: Focus On Minding Your Own Business

Distractions are all around us and that’s where our focus goes. It’s hard to avoid – it’s on your phone, TV and at work. Some businesses are even built around capturing your attention with these distractions.

When we get caught up scrolling through social media and mindlessly watching TV (among other things), we lose ourselves. We think about everything else, except what we’re doing with our own lives.

What Do You Focus On?

Everyone has an opinion. We participate in conversations and listen to what’s happening around us and we automatically have our own version of what we would do in that situation.

Our minds are constantly working. It’s important to have productive discussions on different things, but you don’t have to give a response to everything, all the time.

We’re so used to putting our two cents in about other people’s business that we forget our own. Our focus becomes what we think about what’s going on outside of us, as opposed to what’s going on within ourselves.

Energy Flows Where Attention Goes

This is why celebrities are rich – we constantly give our attention to them, as if it really matters, and they continue to become bigger distractions.

Imagine if you didn’t pay attention to what the president said today. What if you didn’t pay attention to the latest scandal? If you didn’t pay attention to that celebrity and what happened on their yacht?

These are all distractions. When you give away your concentration to things that don’t affect you and your life, it’s a distraction. Yes, it’s entertaining on some level, but some of us forget that we have a life of our own to design.

Giving your attention to something is the same as giving away your energy. It takes energy to focus. Don’t give your energy away to someone or something else to the point where you neglect yourself. Your life deserves to have your energy and attention. Besides, who else is crafting your life, but you?

Be Your Own Distraction

Instead of worrying about why your favorite football player is not starting in the game, focus on why you haven’t started in your own game.

When you direct your focus on something other than yourself, it takes away from your goals. Time is of the essence and we must take responsibility for our actions daily.

This won’t happen if you’re continuously glued to your device. Let your own life be your distraction. Focus on your plan, so you can become successful like the people you are being distracted by.

Concentrate On Your Own Business

If it’s not going to change anything in your life, leave it alone. What Kim Kardashian wore yesterday shouldn’t dominate your thoughts and conversation. She’s not helping you in any way.

You can like her all you want to, but don’t forget about your life, by being wrapped up in her life. She already has her millions – do you have yours?

You are in control of where your attention goes, how you think and your path to greatness. Be confident enough to live the life of your dreams and stop watching others live the life of their dreams. You are worthy of your own focus and success.

#BeGoalden

What Does It Take To Turn On Your Light?

There may be times where you feel like nothing’s working. Success is for other people, not for you.

The first challenge is knowing what you want. If you don’t know your destination, how will you get there? Setting goals is the first thing you must do.

Seeing success can be delusional. It looks as if the other person has been there all of their life, or it took them no time at all to get there.

The part that you don’t see is where the magic lies.

Once you know where you’re going, you must figure out how to get there. The task may seem overwhelming, but it can be done, if you take it step by step.

The second challenge is forming habits and daily rituals. There has to be some sort of rhythm or pattern in place, in order to make progress.

People who set standards for themselves have a way that they do certain things, everyday. To be productive, there has to be habits in place to accommodate improvement.

The third challenge is taking action and moving forward. It’s not as easy as it sounds, considering the constant distractions we deal with on a daily basis. Even past that, starting is the hardest part of any journey, but it definitely can be done.

Not knowing what to do or where to start is a process in itself. When you feel lost, what do you do?

All of these challenges are what contribute to your potential success. Making the decision to follow through with the process is up to you.

Remove Your Limiting Beliefs

Let’s get this out of the way – before you begin anything in life, you must remove your limiting beliefs.

This can be tricky, because when you think you’ve removed them, they come back. It’s going to be a constant battle in your mind.

A strong foundation of discipline, focus and consistency will help along the way, but it won’t help unless you use them.

As you’re reading this now, your mind may be fighting against you, because you are about to do something it’s not used to – something uncomfortable. You’re having new ideas and you’re thinking new thoughts. It’s easy to just lay back and float down the river, but that’s not the path to success.

Going against the current is the path. Your mind is the current and you have to paddle you boat past those false beliefs, no matter how hard it is. Start believing you can, you deserve it, and it’s possible. Whatever the negative part of your mind is saying, believe the opposite.

If you want to stay comfortable and want to do the easy things, then this isn’t for you. It’s for those who are willing to step up to the challenge and advance towards a more productive and fulfilling life.

Living in fear can hold you back from the most amazing things that are waiting for you. It leads to regret – there is nothing more mentally devastating, than living with regret.

There are no hacks involved and no shortcuts. This is the work that has to be done, prior to your success.

Go ahead – turn on your light.

#BeGoalden

Change Is Uncomfortable, And That’s Good

Change makes us uncomfortable, but it’s nothing to be afraid of. Your ability to overcome a sudden challenge is greater than you think.

Building rituals and routines into your life is necessary. After all, it helps with productivity and time management efforts and it makes us feel comfortable when we know what to expect.

What happens when we encounter change? Instead of going right, your idea goes left? Do you overreact to what’s going on or do you keep a level head and flow with it?

Change Is Uncomfortable…

Things happen – it’s a part of life. Every now and then, something knocks us off balance and we don’t like it.

For the most part, we have to address the situation. We really don’t want to, especially when we’re in a good place. No one likes to stop and figure out what’s wrong, when everything has been going right.

Change can make you feel uncomfortable, stressed out, fearful, awkward, and sometimes, embarrassed. When you don’t have an immediate solution, it can be scary.

…And That’s Good

Rather than having negative thoughts and emotions towards change, embrace it. You’re about to learn something that you wouldn’t have, otherwise.

This is an opportunity for you to gain more knowledge about what works and what doesn’t work. It’s your chance to figure things out and enhance your thinking skills.

Don’t run from it. Take advantage of what’s about to happen. No matter what the situation is, there’s always something to gain from it.

Open your mind and shift your perspective. Your brain has a way of introducing new ideas and unique thoughts into your life. You may not like it, but remember: it’s not a problem, it’s a challenge and that’s what makes you mentally stronger.

Be Flexible

Be water, my friend.
Bruce Lee

Change is inescapable. You can not avoid it or make it go away. When you begin to accept it, as opposed to resisting it, you take on the responsibility of stepping up to the plate and allowing yourself to grow.

Be flexible. Your journey won’t be a straight line. If you want to be an achiever, you have to learn to bend with flow. Most people will give up at this point, all because it’s not going the way they envisioned it.

When you take on those obstacles, there’s always a lesson to learn. Don’t quit because it becomes difficult- this is where growth happens. You are more than capable of handling any kind of change that comes your way. Don’t sell yourself short.

Grow Through It

So, how do you handle change? You face it head on. Take a moment to have your emotions, but you must remember that it still needs to be taken care of.

Change is not easy, but remember that you will come out on the other side successfully. You may be a little bruised, but you’re fine – you conquered it and you’re okay.

The next time it happens, it won’t be a surprise. You’ll be that much more skilled in how to manage it. Don’t just go through it, grow through it. You’ll begin to appreciate change, because you’ll find that it builds you into an incredible person.

#BeGoalden

3 Distractions You Can Avoid To Gain An Edge On Life

Building yourself in a world full of distractions is difficult. Knowing how to gain an edge on life can be a great benefit to you.

What do you do in order to get ahead? Do you possess the traits of a person worthy of success? Are you willing to put forth the effort to separate yourself from those who are average?

3 Distractions You Can Stop Today

Stop gossiping. Why are you talking about someone else? It has nothing to do with you. In fact, discussing other people’s personal business is one of the biggest distractions. Never mind what they’re doing and how they’re doing it – if it has nothing to do with you, it shouldn’t be up for discussion. Talk about how you’re going to make yourself better and more productive.
Don’t be jealous. I understand that it’s hard to not pay attention to how well things are going for others, but being jealous doesn’t help. Again, if it has nothing to do with you, don’t give it your energy. We all have a unique journey and some people reach their goals faster than others. Also, you don’t know the backstory of how they got there. Take your focus back and use it to follow your own path.
Never hold a grudge. Let it go. You’re only hurting yourself when you hold a grudge against someone. Every single time you think about it, you’re taking away precious time from your life. It gives you unnecessary anxiety and stress. Whatever happened, forgive them for your sake and move on.

1 Thing You Can Start Today

If you can discipline yourself to stop doing those three things, you’ll notice a shift in your personal productivity.

There’s one thing you can do to help you gain that edge – do more. No matter what it is, do more. Even if you do just one more, that’s more than what the average person will do.

Over time, doing more will give you an advantage. When you read one more page, do one more rep, or make one more call, you’re preparing yourself to win. Doing one more will give you the advantage, but you won’t know until you practice it.

Give Yourself A Chance

No one is going to do it for you. It’s not just going to happen. If you stop gossiping, being jealous and holding grudges, you’re way ahead of those who enhance those habits by scrolling through social media and watch reality TV.

Give yourself a chance to build your life into who you want to be. You have a choice to be distracted or to be focused. Concentrate on yourself and mind your own business. Whatever it is, do more than needed and you’ll gain an edge on life.

#BeGoalden

Building Life-Changing Habits

Everyone has habits and patterns that they live by. Most of those habits are done unconsciously and carried over into adulthood from our childhood environment. Building life-changing habits isn’t hard, once you figure out what habits you want to change.

After becoming an adult, you begin to recognize those habits you didn’t create. Maybe you have a drink after work every night or you read a chapter from a book before bedtime. Whatever it is, determine which habits propel you forward or hold you back.

The Habit Of Fear

Your childhood environment has impressed upon you certain habits. One of those habits could be fear.

My mother is deathly afraid of water. When we were younger, we would take trips to the beach, but she would warn us not to get in past our ankles. We weren’t even allowed to sit on the side of the pool. Water was not allowed in our lives, unless we were taking a shower or washing dishes.

As we became older, my siblings and I realized that water wasn’t as bad as we thought. We’ve led active lives by learning how to swim, taking water aerobics and participating in other water sports, without fear.

It took a while to get rid of that fear, because it was ingrained in us to never get too close to water. Once we became older, we changed that fear into something more productive.

The Habit Of Consistency

On the other hand, my father is an avid reader. Every night when he came home from work, he would read the newspaper.

This was another unconscious habit I picked up in my childhood. I love to read almost anything I can get my hands on. Like him, there’s not a day that goes by without me reading something.

This is one of the habits I learned in childhood that served me well. Not only does reading improve your comprehension and understanding, it helps to increase your focus.

What Habits Have You Created?

The biggest misconception about habits is that they can’t be changed. Just because it’s a habit doesn’t mean it’s permanent.

Think about where most of your habits come from. Whether they are good habits or bad habits, you have the power to change them to work in your favor.

Create new habits for yourself. What is that one thing you want to do every morning before you start your day, or that one thing you want to do before you go to bed? Make it a habit and it will become a natural part of your everyday life.

Positive Habits Can Change Your Life

By creating positive habits, or replacing bad habits with better habits, it can change your life.

The more you challenge yourself with good habits, the more confidence you will have. Things that seemed too scary to do, will become easier over time.

Building good habits will also diminish your limiting thoughts and beliefs. The more you do that habit, it will increase your self-esteem and you will find courage to follow through with your goals.

Always Have Productive Habits

When you develop your good habits, never stop. Instead of walking one mile, keep improving until you can walk or run a marathon. The good thing about practicing good habits is that they lead to better opportunities and endless possibilities.

It’s important to keep increasing your efforts and habits. Take it one day at a time and reward yourself. Celebrate the small wins, so that you know it’s possible. This helps as you move closer to your end result.

If you want to change your life for the better, you must start by building better habits. Replace the bad habits with life-changing habits by taking baby steps. If it’s a bad habit, do it a little bit less. If it’s a good habit, do it a little bit more.

Day by day and week after week, you’ll start to see a shift towards a more constructive and energetic life!

#BeGoalden

How Not To Make Your Goals Harder Than They Are

Thinking about chasing our goals and dreams can seem intimidating. There are no instructions on how to get there, so you have to create your own path through trial and error. This causes us to overthink and make the task harder than it really is.

When we scroll through social media, we see endless posts of people who are supposedly successful and living their dream life. They appear to have already accomplished their goals and want to show you how awesome it is.

Living your dream can be awesome, but don’t get caught up with what you see. If you ask half of those people how they got there, most of them are unable to tell you because it’s all fake. They’re living in someone’s dream world, just not theirs.

Getting started is not as hard as you think.

Don’t make it difficult, just because you don’t have a blueprint. If you consider these 3 tips, you will be able to begin your journey and achieve your goals.

Get clear on what you are doing. Your mind is truly your best asset. Use it to think through your plans and set mini-goals along the way. Do your research and find out what you need, just enough to get started. Don’t be indecisive – you want a fair amount of information, but not too much to where you won’t begin. Once you become clear and take action, some of your journey will unfold before you and guide you to what’s next.
Being overwhelmed doesn’t have to happen. Things can seem overwhelming in your mind. When you see someone who has accomplished their goals, your mind instantly thinks, ‘how do I get there?’ You think of all of the things they had to do to get there and it seems like so much. This can lead to procrastination, but remember, if you don’t start, you won’t finish. It’s not going to happen all in one day, but the key is to take the first step.
Distractions will hinder your progress. There are a million distractions around us, waiting for you to give up your attention to them. Whatever takes your attention away from what’s in front of you is a distraction. Recognize what they are and keep them away. When you see or hear it, put it back in it’s place, somewhere where it won’t bother you. Your job is to remain focused on your task, so you can improve your chances of reaching your goal.

Success Isn’t Easy…

…but it’s not that hard, either. When you figure out what needs to be done and stop allowing your feelings and other distractions to get in your way, it’s very obtainable.

Why not think that you are able to do it? Believe in yourself and disable the negative chatter in your head. It’s just as easy to say, “I can do it, ” as it is to say, “I’ll never be able to do it.” Always put your energy towards positive thoughts.

Take Ownership Of Your Choices

Be aware of your outer environment, as well as what goes on in your head. You could be the reason why you haven’t started – it’s not always something on the outside. You are in charge. Make the right decision and believe that you can do it.

You can only blame your circumstances and your upbringing for so long. Be in control of your thoughts and know that it’s not as hard as you make it out to be.

#BeGoalden

3 Ways Being Alone Can Increase Your Productivity

“I can’t hear myself think!” Those are the words of my mother, whenever it was too loud or she needed to get away from a crowd of people. I never understood what she meant, until I became older.

Some of us have a fear of being alone. We’ve been raised to have a social life and to not be anti-social. We have friends at school, friends at work and our family around us at our every waking moment.

There’s a time to be social and a time to be alone. It can be kind of hard to sift through your thoughts and make decisions when there’s a lot going on around you, so isolating yourself helps.

It’s good to have people around you, but don’t be afraid to be alone at times. Your best productivity can come from being alone.

Being alone encourages us to think our own thoughts. When you’re around other people, you hear many ideas and opinions that may be different from your own. When you’re alone, you have the mental space to discover how you feel about certain things. You have a chance to come up with your own beliefs and standards. There’s no one to bombard you with their thoughts.
Being alone helps you to work independently. It’s easy to hide within a group. Receiving praise or criticism is a lot better when it’s spread around to many people. When you work by yourself, you learn to take full responsibility for what you do. Also, you have complete control over what you’re trying to accomplish. Your creativity has no bounds when you’re working independently.
Being alone allows you to spend time with the most important person – you. Listen to your own thoughts and ideas. Get to know you. Every morning, before you walk out into the world, learn to have peace with yourself. You are in charge of building and becoming the person you want to be. When you know who you are, you’re more comfortable with what goes on outside of yourself.

Sitting with yourself gives you the opportunity to remove yourself from the dramatics of life and to get clear on what you want. It allows you to think through your goals and create effective plans. Others may tell you that being by yourself is weird, but it promotes a sense of wellness and productive independence. You are using your power to create a calmness that only you can give yourself.

There are times where we need to be with ourselves, to recognize what we truly want. We let other people take control of situations without thinking, simply because it’s ‘easier’ at the moment. Sometimes, the talking and all of the commotion can drown out what you really think. By being alone, you give your thoughts and ideas a chance to breathe and come alive. Clarity often comes through isolation.

Anyone can hide in a crowd, but it takes a strong person to stand alone. Take some time to be alone and to ‘hear yourself think’. Experience the wonderful ideas that’s been lurking around in your mind and follow through with action!

#BeGoalden