Raising Your Standards

raising your standards

Being comfortable with where you are could be a sign that it’s time to raise your standards. Challenging yourself may seem boring and unproductive, but in the end, it pays off.

How does it pay off? When you start developing a good habit, it follows you throughout your life. It will show up in how you do everything. You may not be able to recognize it right away because you’ve been working on it for so long, but others will be able to notice it and see your potential.

Think Differently

How do you get better results? What can you do to separate yourself from the average person? Why do you even want to challenge yourself when no one is paying attention?

You get better results by going the extra mile. Most people can do what they’re asked to do, but very few will go the extra mile. How do you go the extra mile?

Going the extra mile means you take it one step further, even when no one is watching. Run one more lap. Read one more page. Save one more dollar.

Do what others aren’t doing.

Raising your standards is where growth happens. You are doing more than the regular person to become better. It doesn’t happen all at once, but you will improve one step at a time.

Stretch Yourself

Even when it seems like you can’t do one more, take a deep breath and go for it! It might hurt, but it won’t kill you.

Get into the habit of doing more. Doing more will allow you to create a pattern of never giving up. When the others stop, you keep going.

This is a characteristic that is only found in people who are disciplined and focused. Distractions will not get in their way. Limiting beliefs will not destroy their work ethic. They know they can only grow if they stretch themselves.

Get Rid Of The Excuses

It can be done, you just have to believe it and raise your standards.

There are many people who are ready to give you a million reasons why you should stop and how it’s a waste of time. These negative comments begin to stick in your head.

When you’re alone, thinking about going the extra mile, those voices will speak to you:

  • “Who are you to do this?”
  • “That will never work…”
  • “You don’t even know how to do that.”
  • “Why don’t you relax, it’s not going to happen anyway…”
  • “Who do you think you are?”

All of these whispers are floating around in your head, but don’t let it hold you back. It feels good to do more than what’s expected of you – it defines who you are and what you’re capable of. All you have to do is follow through.

Stop Expecting It To Be Easy

Greatness is within you, but you have to do the work in order to activate it. That means not listening to the naysayers and expecting things to come easy.

We want things to meet us where we are. Greatness doesn’t meet you where you are – you must get up and go to it! Rise to the occasion and display your best efforts.

It’s not going to be easy. If you want to step into your future, there is work that has to be done. Raise your standards and meet your potential. You’ll surprise yourself at how productive you can be and how far you can go.

#BeGoalden

Don’t Be Hard On Yourself

We tend to be hard on ourselves, unnecessarily. If we do something wrong, we get angry with ourselves, or if we don’t know enough, we stop altogether. Just know that you are doing great, as long as you keep moving forward!

Success isn’t easy. It’s an uphill battle, having to deal with the different challenges and obstacles. There will be many different things that will make you want to quit, but you must find your focus and follow through, even on your bad days.

Judgment From Others

Others will judge you and say insulting things that will make you want to give up. They don’t know the work it takes to achieve a goal. It’s easy to ridicule someone, but it’s more difficult to fight on and win.

Know that you’re doing fine. You are the one making the sacrifices, putting in the odd hours and making adjustments. They aren’t doing the work – you are.

Being lazy and pointing fingers isn’t going to carry you to success. That’s why you’re spending your time wisely, doing things that aren’t comfortable and diligently working.

Failure Is Learning

Don’t let others make you feel bad about what you’re doing – failure is a requirement of achievement. Failure is only learning, it’s not the end! It doesn’t mean you have to stop – in fact, it means you need to keep going!

Being hard on yourself only slows down your progress. Learn to feed your faith and starve your doubt. Be your own cheerleader. Find something good in your day that will spark your mind and give you new ideas.

Celebrate The Small Wins

You have something to be proud of and you should recognize that. Give yourself credit for the little things that are helping you move the needle. Over time, the small wins will carry you to the big wins. Small or big, you’re still improving!

There are people who are trying to stop you already, so don’t stop yourself. You must be your own motivator and your own inspiration. Stop depending on others to give you permission to fulfill your dream.

Criticism Will Never Go Away

Trolls and critics will always be there – they’re not going anywhere. Unfortunately, that’s a given. As a matter of fact, you know you’re doing something right whenever a troll or a critic pops up to say something negative about you.

It’s one of those things you must get used to. Build your mind to be strong enough to take the toughest insult. Use it as motivation and fuel to keep going, so actually, they’re helping you towards your results.

You Didn’t Come This Far, Just To Come This Far

Allowing insults and negativity to make you second guess your path is not the type of feedback you need on your journey, so don’t accept it.

You are here for a reason and to give up now would be giving up on all of the hard work that you’ve done so far. It takes a special kind of person to believe in themselves, especially when no one else does, but you have what it takes!

Give yourself a break and don’t be so hard on yourself. Continue to grow and focus on what’s in front of you – baby steps. Don’t let anything stop you from moving forward.

#BeGoalden

The Kylie Jenner Distraction Effect

Kylie Jenner has been labeled as the youngest self-made billionaire.

That has been the headline for the past few weeks and some of us just don’t know what to do with it or how to take it. There’s one thing for sure…

It’s a huge distraction.

How Distractions Start

Most distractions start with controversial statements. These controversial statements are mostly seen in politics, religion and entertainment.

Someone will say how they feel, someone else will disagree with it and then it starts. Everyone wants to be right and prove the others wrong. We’ve lost the art of respectfully disagreeing.

This is how people become distracted and their focus begins to shift. Now, we’re more focused on why Kylie is the first ‘self-made billionaire,’ yet, we haven’t started working on our own goals.

Going Down The Distraction ‘Black Hole’

Whether Kylie made those phone calls, sent those emails or came up with the chemicals for the makeup herself, it really doesn’t matter.

At the same time, we are worrying about if she really did it herself or if her money made it easier for her and so on. We obsess over if she is really self-made or if her family’s name had anything to do with it.

Her success is a never-ending conversation. Her life is going on, whether you agree with her new title, or not. We are steadily going down this black hole of distraction and it’s hard to stop, because we want so desperately to be right – we want to escape our own reality, by talking about hers.

Let’s Become Self-Made

Instead of being overly concerned about who she is and how she earned her money, let’s shift the focus back to ourselves. How are we going to be self-made? How far along are you with reaching your goal? Have you been keeping up with your own life?

Keep your eyes on your prize. What other people do with their money or how they make their money shouldn’t be any of your concern. The concern is, how are you going to put a dent in the universe?

Obsess over your own plan. Worry about how you’re going to get the results that you want. Don’t let the distractions of others stop you from achieving your goals.

Focus On Yourself

Before you even begin to have an opinion about anything else, work on yourself. Be self-aware. Know who you are.

We get so caught up in other people’s lives, that we forget to nourish our own. People say things, just to throw us off. Distractions are very real.

While the world is debating if she is deserving of that title or not, Kylie is still making money and living her life. It’s not bothering her on the same level as it is bothering everyone else.

Put your time, thoughts and effort into building your dream. Stop allowing these distractions to overwhelm your conversations and your personal space.

Reclaim your time and put the focus back onto you.

#BeGoalden

Motivation 101 – How Motivation Works

motivation

“Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.” Jim Rohn

Before you set out to do anything, there has to be something there that makes you want to do it. It could be a person who encourages you, a life or death situation or a lack of a resource, such as money. Whatever it is, it motivates you to become better.

Motivation is how you begin. It sparks something in you that forces you to want change. After that initial spark, it’s your choice to make the next move.

What You Should Do, When Motivation Hits

  1. Don’t wait. It’s best to start right away when you experience that motivational spark. It’s a sign telling you to act now! If you aren’t in a place where you can take action immediately, take out your phone and write it down. Be sure to handle it before the end of the day. Procrastinating will only decrease your desire to begin.
  2. Keep it positive. Instead of thinking of how it won’t work, think of how it will work. Being negative about it will work against you and before you know it, your idea dies. Stay positive about your intentions. Avoid killing the idea in your head before you have the opportunity to work on it.
  3. Stay focused. When working on your idea, the hardest part is remaining focused. There are many distractions (and people) that will convince you to give up or make you think that this isn’t for you. Your idea deserves to be acknowledged and brought to completion, but you can only do this with laser focus.

The Wrong Motivation

People think that motivation is all good, but there can be bad motivation, as well.

There may be situations where you aren’t in the best place. You begin to have ideas that you think will save you, but it’s simply a bad idea.

Times like these can be very tempting, but you must go about it in the right way. Even when you’re hanging around a bad crowd, it can be easy to go with the flow and become motivated to do the wrong thing.

Your thoughts can be your most powerful leader. As challenging as life can be, think through your circumstances and always do the right thing. Remember the good motivation to help you get through.

Motivation Opens You To Opportunities

When you maintain a positive mindset, things around you will change in your favor. It’s not that it wasn’t there before, it’s just that you’re now seeing it because you have a new outlook.

Motivation clears your mind of the negative clutter and allows you to see new possibilities. It gives you the chance to experience different things and in return, new opportunities will appear.

Some people say that motivation doesn’t work. Anything will work if you use it correctly.

Put Yourself In The Right Mindset

We all have to start somewhere. Motivation is that start for most people. If you continue to use it to your advantage and practice with it on a daily basis, you will see that it works for you, as opposed to working against you.

Listen to those motivational podcasts and read motivational content. It will help you, more than it will hurt you. Sometimes, all you need is to be reminded that you are more than capable of achieving your dreams.

#BeGoalden

How To Get Lucky In Life

“They’re just lucky.” That phrase is used so often, some people actually believe it.

Life isn’t fair. Should we all have been born rich? Snap our fingers and have what we want? Have things go our way, everyday?

Being lucky sounds great in theory, but imagine what kind of person you would be, if everything automatically happened for you. We all have a different opinion of how awesome it would be to have a manufactured life.

Now that we know that life really isn’t fair, let’s work the other angle. Since it isn’t fair, how do we go about turning it around in our favor and making our own luck?

Control Your Lucky Mindset

Don’t be the person who always find excuses as to why you aren’t lucky and how it will always be this way. Think on the other side of your mind for a change.

What can you do to shift your thoughts? Be positive. If you need help, watch videos or listen to podcasts to get you started. You won’t become successful just by listening and watching, but it may get the wheels in your mind turning and spark you to take action.

We can be so hung up on what won’t happen, that we forget that we have the power to make things happen. You’ll be surprised at how far you can go if you actually put your mind to it.

Create Daily Lucky Habits

Doing the same thing everyday, will get you what you already have. Nothing.

If you want your situation to change, you have to change what you do. Start building new habits that lean towards the life you want for yourself.

Begin with the basics of minding your money and your health. These are things that are easy to overlook, but we could always improve and become better.

Saving a portion of your money and exercising everyday will build discipline in other areas of your life. Once you see those results, you’ll want to form more habits that contribute to the vision of your life.

Be Luckily Responsible

The best thing you can do for yourself is take responsibility for your life. No, it may not be fair, but that doesn’t mean you should sit back and let anything happen.

Hold yourself accountable. Save yourself. Do what needs to be done and don’t look for anyone else to do anything for you. Blaming and complaining will not get you anywhere.

It’s so easy to be lazy and talk about how she had a ‘head start in life’ and how he ‘received a trust fund from his parents.’ This may be true, but it has nothing to do with you and your abilities.

They are not your responsibility. You are responsible for your own actions. Do what it takes to move your life to the next level. Worrying about how someone else has it better than you is ridiculous, because it doesn’t help your situation. Focus on yourself.

Be Your Own Luck

Luck has everything to do with your mindset, habits and responsibility. This is how you beat the unfairness of life – you shape your own luck. Be willing to dedicate your time and use your resources wisely if you want the life of your dreams.

Stop looking at what others have and concentrate on your own plan. Watching someone else’s life causes you to compare your life to theirs and that’s where you’re being unfair to yourself.

Be glad that you get to create your own life, as opposed to someone handing it to you on a silver platter. It may take time and diligence, but it’s your creation. This is your opportunity to grow into your greatness, not someone else’s.

Lose those daily excuses and constant complaining. Take that energy and use it towards becoming the magnificent person that you are.

#BeGoalden

Focus On The Process, Not The Result

Photo by Jo Szczepanska on Unsplash

When we set our goals, our mind automatically starts to focus on the end result, but the biggest part is figuring out how to hit the target and win.

Twenty years ago, it was a challenge to find an abundance of successful people. They were there, but our access was limited to television, radio and the newspaper.

Today, we can see success everywhere, at anytime. The internet has opened up many avenues for more people to achieve their dreams. Even people who aren’t successful can pretend like they are on social media.

Instant Gratification

This leads to ‘short-cut’ thinking. We’re so flooded with images of people who’ve reached their goals (or at least they look like they did), we begin to think that it’s an easy process.

Although it looks like it, the path to your goal isn’t easy and that’s not to discourage you. Anything worth doing will take hard work and consistency, but you must concentrate on the process.

Does anybody remember when Beyonce started out with Girls Tyme? No, we only recognized her when she came on the scene with Destiny’s Child. Prior to that, she was practicing and working her little heart out to be who she is today.

Technology has made everything so easy, we expect the goal to happen without going through the process. Fast food, texting, all kinds of apps – it’s designed to make life more convenient, but there’s one thing that won’t give you that instant gratification.

Why Is This Taking So Long?

When you have a goal to reach, it will take months or even years before you will see the end result.

Envisioning the end result is good to do. It gives you something to see in your mind as you work on your plan.

The trick is, you must focus on the plan, not the result. You can focus on the result all day long, but nothing will happen. You must focus on the plan that will get you there.

The plan is what needs to be figured out and adjusted on a regular basis. Things change and you have to be flexible enough to create solutions to those challenges.

No One Path Is Alike

There are no two paths alike, that will achieve the same goal. There may be an overall map that will carry you in the right direction, but as far as an exact path that we all can take and experience the same success, that simply doesn’t exist.

Everyone has to figure it out for themselves. This is why you focus on the path, because is will change. Life happens and you may have to rearrange what you are doing to accommodate your circumstances.

It’s important to stay open-minded because you never know who will be able to assist you. Do different things and take risks and see where it leads.

Envision your result, but focus on the process.

Hoping that you will succeed won’t work. Wishing someone will let you tag along won’t work. Those are distractions and the best way to avoid them is to buckle down and focus on your process.

While your goal won’t change, the path to get there will change many times. It will take mental and physical energy to take on this effort and to do your best. You must be ready and willing on all fronts to encounter your journey.

Don’t let time become a factor. Time is always there, it just depends on how you plan to use it to your advantage. As they say, it takes years to become an overnight success.

Be flexible, make adjustments and be persistent. Know that it will take time, discipline and consistency. People won’t see how hard you are working now, but they will definitely realize, once you’ve reached your goal and become successful.

#BeGoalden

Time Is Always Of The Essence

Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash

Often, we live our lives as if we know there will be tomorrow. We’ll procrastinate and put things off or we’ll live in complacency, not being moved to do anything. All because we think, ‘there’s always tomorrow.’

As this may be true, one day, that won’t be the case. Time is always of the essence. Therefore, we should be mindful of how we spend it and who we give it to. People always use the excuse that they don’t have time for their goals, but in reality, all they need to do is remix what’s already on their plate.

  1. Wake up earlier or stay up later. No, you don’t necessarily need to rise early before the sun to be successful, but if you need to find more time, this is one way to get it. Not everyone is an early bird, but there’s time on the other side of the day, too – you can stay up later. Either way, it may cost you a couple of hours of sleep, but it won’t destroy you. If it’s important enough to you, that’s one way you can find more time.
  2. Identify those in-between times. You know those times where you pick up your phone and start to scroll through social media. Before you know it, 45 minutes have gone by, all because you had ‘nothing’ to do. In-between times also include ‘down time’ at work, watching reruns on TV and sitting in traffic on the way to your destination. During those times, you can do something productive or think through your plans.
  3. Weekends aren’t just for relaxing. The weekend is probably the most time you’ll have to work on your goal. Our minds have been conditioned to relax and ‘take a load off’ during the weekend because of the 40 hour work week. While that’s your choice, just know that the weekend consists of 2 unscheduled days to do what you want to do. If that goal is important to you, the weekend is the perfect time to work on it.
  4. Watch TV series, not episodes. Every week, we tune in to different channels to watch our favorite TV shows. With technology today, you can record the entire series or watch it on an app. Instead of literally sitting down every night at 8pm to watch one episode week by week, record the entire series or watch the series once it ends on the app. This way, you can work on your plan every night and binge watch the series. It also eliminates cliffhangers because you’ll see the entire series all at once, without having to wait another week 🙂

These are just a few ways to enhance your time management.

Time is constant and it’s always there – the rhythm never changes.

Rather than saying you don’t have time, be forward thinking and adjust the time that you already have.

You don’t have to wake up every morning at 4am to be successful, but that is a way to find some extra time. If you don’t like the idea of waking up early or staying up late, look for other ways to fine-tune your daily schedule and create a new agenda to follow.

Time is always of the essence because it’s one of the few things that we can never get back. One day, there won’t be a chance to procrastinate, so use your time with intent and focus. With the right strategy, time will always be on your side.

#BeGoalden

Change The Path, Not The Goal

Photo by John Torcasio on Unsplash

We all want to get there in as little time and pain, as possible. No matter what it is, our logic tells us to take the path of least resistance.

If you haven’t noticed, that path leads no where. It takes you directly to the place where you don’t want to be or back to square one – with the other average people.

The entire point is to get to your goal. You start and you hit an obstacle. That’s what happens. You figure it out (hooray!) and then you continue. Something happens that sets you back two steps. You deal with it.

Your belief in reaching your goal is strong, but a few months in, your faith begins to get a little shaky. “There has to be a better way,” you think.

Doing your best, you come up with a plan and switch your game up. That seems to help! Once again, you’re making progress. You can see the top of the mountain and you’re getting closer and closer.

After turning down dinner with friends, working through the weekends and remaining disciplined and focused, you finally reach your goal!

Congratulations! This is what it takes. Too many of us want the quick and easy way to the end. We want to see it before we even start to move towards it, just to be sure it’ll get us to where we want to be. The only way is to start and feel your way until you get there.

Everyone wants to see the path before they take it.

The Goalden Lady

We can plan that path, but understand that it will not always lead to the desired destination. It’s up to us to not quit – go back to the drawing board and create a new path.

Change the path, not the goal.

Let’s take football, for example. The object of the game is to get to your side of the field, with the football and score a touchdown. Every play that your team makes is important. Sometimes, your team will fumble the football and set you back 20 yards.

Then, you use another plan to throw the ball down the field. It could get intercepted or your team mate could catch it and run as far as they can, without getting tackled.

Or, you could pass the football to the running back for them to run as far as they can, while avoiding getting tackled by the other team.

Your team never stops, even if the ball is turned over to the opposing team – they keep trying with a different plan, to score a touchdown.

Even if the odds are against you to make a touchdown, you can still make an attempt to kick a field goal to get some points (which is still progress).

Both teams change their plans many times to reach their goal, but they never stop. When someone gets hurt, the game may stop for a while, but it continues. The goal still has to be accomplished.

This is how it is with your goals. Have a mindset that never quits. People will ‘tackle’ you and try to push you out of bounds (or away from your goal). Like the relentless football player, you must keep moving down the field until you score a touchdown. There’s no other way.

It’s time to play ‘football’ with your life. Never stop reaching for success. The clock hasn’t run out. Until then, you can keep changing and adjusting your plan an infinite number of times.

Change your path and adjust as often as you need to, but remember to keep the goal in front of you, at all times.

#BeGoalden

Are You Working Against Yourself?

Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

We all encounter distractions and nonsense on a daily basis. Whether it’s at work, on TV or on social media, it’s always there, fighting for our attention.

As a result, we’ve become immune to it. It’s doesn’t present a challenge to us any more because we’re so used to it. Becoming used to it has given us permission to just deal with it and to allow it into our minds.

Here are a few ways you’re working against yourself and how you can work towards doing better.

  1. You have your notifications on. When you’re working, your attention is supposed to be focused on what’s in front of you, 100%. As soon as you hear a ‘ting’, you look up to see who or what it’s about. Someone just posted another funny cat video. Now, your attention is broken and it will take a considerable amount of time to get it back. Turn off those notifications! It can wait until you’re done.
  2. You overindulge yourself with information. Yes, it is critical to do research and collect information for what you’re doing, but sometimes, it can be too much. If you want to learn how to sew, do enough research to start. You don’t have to watch 50 videos and read 50 websites to take action. Look up the necessary information and go out and do it! Getting caught up in being a professional researcher only allows for procrastination and when you procrastinate, you don’t start!
  3. You leave your mind open to anything. Your mindset is the most important asset you own. It’s good to have an open mind, but determine what is useful and what needs to go. Stop letting garbage enter your mind. It could be in the form of gossip, reality TV, social media, etc. Control what goes into your mind. If you plant good seeds, they will grow. If you plant bad seeds, they will also grow (weeds), but which would you prefer? It affects your attitude and your day when you consume garbage. Take in some motivational videos, get around good people and have meaningful conversations.
  4. You hit snooze every morning. Just wake up. Why do we fight waking up every single morning? That’s the first struggle of many throughout the day. Whenever you hit the snooze button, you never get more sleep. Figure out whether an earlier bedtime would help, a cold shower or a cleaner diet, but whatever it is, see how you can avoid that daily battle. It sets the tone for the rest of the day and it allows for a stressful start. It’s easier said than done, but it shouldn’t be overlooked. Develop a better routine to greeting your day.

Not only will these things cause you to work against yourself, they cause anxiety, as well. You can blame it on other factors, but you have power over what you do and how you do it. Even if you’re unable to control your environment, you can still make adjustments. Don’t just sit there and take it.

Fighting against yourself and being counterproductive is all on you. Decide what goes into your mind, decide to take action and decide to work fully focused. You can control all of these things. All it takes is a present mindset and intentional action. You can do it!

#BeGoalden

Improving Your Mental Environment

Photo by Alireza Attari on Unsplash

It’s been said that you can’t help the type of environment you were born into, but it is your fault if you stay there. 

Some people are born into a negative environment. Whether it influences you mentally or physically, recognize that you have the ability to rise to a new level.

If you can fix your mental environment, eventually, your physical environment will change for the better, also.

It can be difficult to overcome pessimistic surroundings, but keep in mind, no one is coming to save you. You have to learn how to turn the negative into a positive, in order to be successful.

People in your environment may gossip, watch TV all day, or waste time worrying about things they can’t control. Give yourself a chance to exceed this type of mentality.

Just because you are around it, doesn’t mean you have to succumb to it’s negativity.

There are ways you can improve your mental environment. Here are a few recommendations:

  1. Listen to a podcast. Nowadays, you’re not stuck listening to whatever’s playing on the radio. You can listen to any type of content that you like. There are literally thousands to choose from. Search for something that speaks to what you want to do or how you want to be. Even though there is a huge variety to choose from, don’t get caught up listening to the wrong thing. The point is to listen to words that can motivate you to live your dream.
  2. Watch YouTube videos that strengthen your mind. Like podcasts, there are many videos you can choose from. If you’re interested in plant-based foods, there’s a beginner’s video for that. If you’re interested in learning how to integrate a certain software with another, there’s a specific video for that. There is so much to learn with YouTube videos – make it your personal video library.
  3. Join a group. Involving yourself with a group can be encouraging and motivating. There are many select interest groups that have members where they can help you or you can help others with different challenges. You can even lurk around in the group until you feel comfortable with participating. Avoid groups where the members are negative – you want to be among like-minded individuals, who hold the same interests and goals as you do.

Escaping a bad environment is hard enough, but if you can protect your personal space with positivity, it’s very much worth the effort.

Listening to podcasts and watching videos are things you can do independently of others. No one has to know what you’re listening to or watching – it can be done without anyone volunteering their opinion. 

Joining groups or masterminds involve other people. Some may be ‘know-it-alls’ or Negative Nancy’s. Don’t give in to those types – there are other people who are very helpful and can offer guidance and insight within the group. Stick with those types and ignore the others who may just want attention or be a negative leader.

Technology has provided us with so many options to be better in this day and age, the least we could do is take advantage of the best of it. If not, be prepared to be left behind in just about every aspect of life, because it is everywhere.

If you improve your mental environment, your physical environment will eventually follow suit. In today’s world, there is no excuse to not become who you are meant to be.

#BeGoalden