focus Archives - Page 2 of 4 - The Goalden Lady

Intention Will Get You Farther Along Than Hope

It’s the beginning of the New Year and everyone has a resolution. Most resolutions are created in the spirit of the event, but very few are realized in real life with intention and focus.

What normally happens is, we begin to hope. We hope that we can lose weight or we hope that we can make more money. Hope doesn’t do what intention will do.

How Far Can Hope Take You?

When we’re young, people often ask us what we want to do when we become adults. No one ever tells us the details in order to get to that destination.

This leads us to hoping and wishing for the desired result. If we don’t know any other way to become what we want to be, we don’t don’t how to take the necessary steps to get there.

You can hope all you want, but the only thing that will change is the amount of time you’ve wasted. A car that doesn’t move doesn’t go anywhere. Thinking about the destination won’t magically get you there and hoping won’t either.

Hope is a good place to start, but it won’t carry you to your end goal. Now, we must connect our hope to intention. When the connection is made, things will start to happen and you will see more opportunities to grow.

Intention Involves Work

Intention is where the real work begins. Doing things on purpose builds your character and allows you to design your own path to success, with confidence.

Do you hope to win the game or do you practice in order to have the best advantage to win the game? Will you hope to read two books in one month, or will you come up with a strategy to read two books in one month?

The difference is night and day. Hope feels good in your mind, but intention will actually exercise your mind to get to where you want to be.

With intention, you know what you’re going to do and how you’re going to do it. You create a deadline and you think of alternate ways of following through. If you don’t make your deadline, you intentionally keep going anyway.

Be intentional with your free time. Create strategies to reach your achievements. We see successful people, but we don’t see the intentional work that went into their accomplishments.

How To Be Intentional

Understand that being intentional will take work (that’s why it’s called intention, not hope). Make your habits a daily practice in your life, so that you are making progress, everyday.

Make a detailed plan and put aside time to do productive work. This means actually doing the small things that will eventually lead to the big things. Don’t hope you’ll start walking this week, actually get out the door and walk to the end of the street.

Even if you don’t have the appropriate gear, it shouldn’t stop you. There are some things you have to do or figure out along the way, but the most important thing is to start.

All you need to do now, is walk everyday to the end of the street. As the days continue, go farther to develop your stamina and endurance. This is how you develop a habit with intention, which will lead to reaching your goals. There’s no other way to get there – you must simply make a detailed plan, put in the time and DO IT!

Stack The Odds In Your Favor

Nothing happens just because. People accomplish what they set out to do by being intentional and deliberate with their habits. Again, you may see their success, but you never see the details that produced it.

Make it where you will see progress in your life. Only you can force yourself to have better focus, discipline and consistency. Demand more from yourself than others. Know that it won’t get done, unless you take on the personal responsibility and do it.

Instead of looking at the next year, concentrate on today, this week, next month or the next ninety days. Once you begin, you’ll see results within a month and definitely in a year.

Don’t cheat yourself. Be productive on purpose, but most of all, be more intentional than hopeful.

#BeGoalden

What Does It Take To Turn On Your Light?

There may be times where you feel like nothing’s working. Success is for other people, not for you.

The first challenge is knowing what you want. If you don’t know your destination, how will you get there? Setting goals is the first thing you must do.

Seeing success can be delusional. It looks as if the other person has been there all of their life, or it took them no time at all to get there.

The part that you don’t see is where the magic lies.

Once you know where you’re going, you must figure out how to get there. The task may seem overwhelming, but it can be done, if you take it step by step.

The second challenge is forming habits and daily rituals. There has to be some sort of rhythm or pattern in place, in order to make progress.

People who set standards for themselves have a way that they do certain things, everyday. To be productive, there has to be habits in place to accommodate improvement.

The third challenge is taking action and moving forward. It’s not as easy as it sounds, considering the constant distractions we deal with on a daily basis. Even past that, starting is the hardest part of any journey, but it definitely can be done.

Not knowing what to do or where to start is a process in itself. When you feel lost, what do you do?

All of these challenges are what contribute to your potential success. Making the decision to follow through with the process is up to you.

Remove Your Limiting Beliefs

Let’s get this out of the way – before you begin anything in life, you must remove your limiting beliefs.

This can be tricky, because when you think you’ve removed them, they come back. It’s going to be a constant battle in your mind.

A strong foundation of discipline, focus and consistency will help along the way, but it won’t help unless you use them.

As you’re reading this now, your mind may be fighting against you, because you are about to do something it’s not used to – something uncomfortable. You’re having new ideas and you’re thinking new thoughts. It’s easy to just lay back and float down the river, but that’s not the path to success.

Going against the current is the path. Your mind is the current and you have to paddle you boat past those false beliefs, no matter how hard it is. Start believing you can, you deserve it, and it’s possible. Whatever the negative part of your mind is saying, believe the opposite.

If you want to stay comfortable and want to do the easy things, then this isn’t for you. It’s for those who are willing to step up to the challenge and advance towards a more productive and fulfilling life.

Living in fear can hold you back from the most amazing things that are waiting for you. It leads to regret – there is nothing more mentally devastating, than living with regret.

There are no hacks involved and no shortcuts. This is the work that has to be done, prior to your success.

Go ahead – turn on your light.

#BeGoalden

If You Settle Now, You’ll Regret It Later

Some people choose to settle for what they already have. It’s not such a bad thing, but know that you are capable of more.

As 2019 comes to a close, think about the goals you had in place to accomplish this year. All of the challenges and obstacles you faced have brought you to this point.

The end of the year is quickly approaching, but don’t let that stop you from making progress. It may be the end of the year, but as far as your goals are concerned, it’s not over.

Even if you’ve achieved way more than you thought you would, it’s no excuse to settle and coast these last few weeks – stay 5 steps ahead and finish strong.

What Happens If You Settle?

You may not have hit your target before the end of the year, but don’t beat yourself up over it. Take a look at where you are now, compared to this time last year.

There are new things you have learned on your journey. You may have even met some new people along the way. You’ve made it farther than you’ve imagined and that’s something to be proud of.

If you decide to settle and stop working towards your goal, nothing will happen. All of your hard work will have been for nothing. The most disappointing part is, you will live wondering what would have happened if you would’ve kept going.

Settling Is Comfortable

It’s easy to settle. You don’t have to spend any extra time and energy with all the thinking and being productive anymore. It feels rather comfortable and nice.

Some people are glad you stopped going so hard – now, you’ve made them feel comfortable, too. They don’t feel threatened by your ambition anymore and everyone is on the same level again.

This isn’t what really needs to happen. Actually, you should probably just take a break and then get back to taking action. Don’t be so quick to give up. Taking the easy way out may be convenient at the time, but don’t settle, just continue to be persistent. You’ll be glad you did in the end.

Your Potential Is Greater Than Fear

Many things will make you want to give up. It seems like nothing is working out and you’re just tired and ready to tap out. Distractions will present themselves as opportunities to quit.

You begin to think it’ll never happen. It may take longer than you thought. Maybe it’s time to cut your losses.

Actually, who knows how much longer it will be until you succeed? What if it happens tomorrow? How will you know?

The key is to keep going until you find out what happens. Allow your potential to light your path to the end. Remain positive and ignore the comforts of complacency.

Never Cheat Yourself

Other people’s success always looks simple. The fact is, you didn’t see them when they were going through the same struggle as you. You only see the results.

They wouldn’t have arrived at that outcome, had they settled. If they listened to their friends and family, they never would’ve seen those results.

Discipline, focus, a strong mindset and the ability to overlook the naysayers will give you the ability to finish strong. Whatever others say about you should not dictate how you feel or how you move. Realize that you’re more than that!

Never cheat yourself by settling. Keep going and see what’s in store. Work through your fear and the negative talk in your head. No matter how long it takes, it’s better than giving up and settling for nothing.

#BeGoalden

There’s Always An Excuse

We’ve been used to using an excuse to get out of just about anything we don’t feel like doing. Sometimes, we use them so consistently, it seems like it’s not a big deal and it turns into a worthless routine and a waste of energy.

Actually, excuses over a long period of time will cause you to miss out on your own life. How do you even begin to create a habit of avoiding excuses?

Understand What An Excuse Is

Excuses are lazy reasons we give ourselves, or others, to not follow through with what needs to be done, or a responsibility.

Some may say, “…but it’s a valid reason…”. If it’s a valid reason, then it’s not an excuse. Don’t get caught up in thinking that every excuse is a valid reason.

Deep down inside, we know when we give in to those ‘valid’ reasons. Later, we begin to feel some sort of guilt because we dodged what we could’ve done.

Excuses are disguised as reasonable explanations, when they’re really not. Don’t let it fool you into being lazy and unproductive. Also, beware of others who try to give you excuses to use.

Recognize What Your Excuse Sounds Like

Everyone has a certain word or phrase they use when confronted with a request or responsibility. It usually sounds something like:

“I don’t want to.”

“I’m tired.”

“Why can’t she do it?”

“I did it yesterday.”

“If he would’ve done it the right way in the first place…”

All of these are the beginnings of a whiny excuse. When you recognize what your excuse sounds like, you can make the attempt to avoid going down that road.

Start by knowing you can do whatever it is that needs to be done. You can make it happen and move on with your day. Handle your responsibilities with confidence and be accountable for what you do.

Just Do It!

What should you do if you hear yourself about to create an excuse? Just do it!

How do you overcome a life full of excuses? You conquer it by dealing with it head on. Be honest with yourself and lean into it. Yes, it’s hard, but there’s no other way to rid yourself of this ugly, unfulfilling habit.

It’s easier said than done, but it is very possible. Free yourself and become the excellent person you want to be. Nothing comes easy – it starts with eliminating those useless thoughts and words and taking action towards becoming more responsible.

If You Want To Be Excellent…

It all begins in the mind. If you want to be excellent, don’t wish for it, be it.

Being the example holds you to a higher standard. People who play on a different level never consider using excuses. When something needs to be done, it gets done.

No matter how tired you may be, or how late it is, you can always do a little more. When you practice being ambitious, it gets easier with time. You’ll become a beast at getting things done. There’s no room for being average in your journey to success.

Understand the power you have. Many people have done great things before you and you possess the ability to do great things, also. As long as you keep moving forward and stay focused, committed and resilient, you can make all the dreams in your heart come true.

#BeGoalden

Focus On Minding Your Own Business

Distractions are all around us and that’s where our focus goes. It’s hard to avoid – it’s on your phone, TV and at work. Some businesses are even built around capturing your attention with these distractions.

When we get caught up scrolling through social media and mindlessly watching TV (among other things), we lose ourselves. We think about everything else, except what we’re doing with our own lives.

What Do You Focus On?

Everyone has an opinion. We participate in conversations and listen to what’s happening around us and we automatically have our own version of what we would do in that situation.

Our minds are constantly working. It’s important to have productive discussions on different things, but you don’t have to give a response to everything, all the time.

We’re so used to putting our two cents in about other people’s business that we forget our own. Our focus becomes what we think about what’s going on outside of us, as opposed to what’s going on within ourselves.

Energy Flows Where Attention Goes

This is why celebrities are rich – we constantly give our attention to them, as if it really matters, and they continue to become bigger distractions.

Imagine if you didn’t pay attention to what the president said today. What if you didn’t pay attention to the latest scandal? If you didn’t pay attention to that celebrity and what happened on their yacht?

These are all distractions. When you give away your concentration to things that don’t affect you and your life, it’s a distraction. Yes, it’s entertaining on some level, but some of us forget that we have a life of our own to design.

Giving your attention to something is the same as giving away your energy. It takes energy to focus. Don’t give your energy away to someone or something else to the point where you neglect yourself. Your life deserves to have your energy and attention. Besides, who else is crafting your life, but you?

Be Your Own Distraction

Instead of worrying about why your favorite football player is not starting in the game, focus on why you haven’t started in your own game.

When you direct your focus on something other than yourself, it takes away from your goals. Time is of the essence and we must take responsibility for our actions daily.

This won’t happen if you’re continuously glued to your device. Let your own life be your distraction. Focus on your plan, so you can become successful like the people you are being distracted by.

Concentrate On Your Own Business

If it’s not going to change anything in your life, leave it alone. What Kim Kardashian wore yesterday shouldn’t dominate your thoughts and conversation. She’s not helping you in any way.

You can like her all you want to, but don’t forget about your life, by being wrapped up in her life. She already has her millions – do you have yours?

You are in control of where your attention goes, how you think and your path to greatness. Be confident enough to live the life of your dreams and stop watching others live the life of their dreams. You are worthy of your own focus and success.

#BeGoalden

Living In Your Phone Leads To Defeat And Distraction

Living in your phone is the biggest distraction. It’s self-defeating because you know what you’re capable of, but your attention is on what others are doing.

Using electronic devices, such as your phone, is a form of voluntary distraction. Depending on what you use it for, it can have an effect on your daily perspective of life.

Shiny Object Syndrome

With social media, it can be easy to see how other people have success every second. They post pictures of cars and money and it makes you think that you can do it, too. You can, but are you willing to put in the work?

It’s easy to see success, but it’s not so easy to see and accept the work that goes behind it. No one wants to experience the journey, only the results. This is why you’re not accomplishing anything, because you keep hopping around from one thing to another, thinking it’ll make you rich like the other person.

That, in itself, is a distraction. You’re focused on how awesome it would be to have all the friends, cars and the money, but you never get started on the actual path. Even if you do start, if it’s not working, you’ll find something else that’s better (shiny object syndrome) and before you know it, you’ve boarded that train.

Seeing people’s results are distracting, but you must make the decision to follow your own path. Jumping from one thing to the next just because it made one person rich, does not guarantee your success. Stop trying to get rich quick and follow the path you want to take.

It’s Going To Take Time

Once you stop looking for how to get rich quick on social media, then you can begin thinking about what you really want to do.

Some people don’t know what they really like, because they’ve been too busy looking at what other people like. Take a break from others and focus on yourself.

Everything seems to happen instantly on social media, but that’s because no one is publishing their challenges and obstacles. If they did, they might not have such a big following. The process is boring, but the results are exciting.

Understand that when you figure out what you want to do, it’s going to take time. Your journey is unique to you. No one else can go through it for you.

This is why you should do something that you like, or at least, something you’re good at. There will be times when you want to give up, but if it’s something you have the desire to achieve, you’ll have no issues with sticking it out.

Free Your Mind

Take a digital detox day. Turn off your notifications on your phone and pay attention to what’s going on around you. Live outside of your phone for a while.

Having an entire day to yourself without being distracted and controlled by your phone, will allow you to think on a deeper level. You’ll actually start thinking for yourself, as opposed to having a device telling you what to think.

This is how you find what you want to do. Even if the internet is destroyed tomorrow, you would still find a way to achieve your goals.

When you go back to using your devices, instead of using them to see what others are doing, use it as a resource to enhance what you are doing. Social media isn’t all bad – it just depends on how you use it to create your own success.

#BeGoalden

Thoughtful Conversation Is Easier Said, Than Done

Having good conversation is a lost art. Today, it’s like a game – you can only win if you talk over someone or if you keep a useless argument going.

It’s easy to talk a good game. Whatever comes to your mind, you just let it out. You become an instant authority on that subject…or so you think.

Thoughtless Conversation

Sometimes, we go around repeating what others have said because it sounds good. We have no knowledge of what we’re really talking about. No personal research has been conducted and no subjects have been tested.

Our mind tends to follow a conversation, not really listening, but waiting for an opportunity to chime in, just so we can be heard. It doesn’t matter if what we say is incorrect, it just matters that we ‘participated’ in the game and that’s a waste of time.

Stop saying things just to be heard. Have thoughtful conversation. There’s nothing worse than someone contributing half thoughts to a conversation where others are having intentional discussions.

Thoughtful Conversation

Conversations vary. They can be about anything interesting to either party. Instead of listening and actually considering what is being said, we tend to wait our turn.

When talking to someone, you should make an effort to actively listen. Don’t just wait for them to stop talking – ask them questions. Make suggestions based upon what they said. Participate with the intention of learning something.

Having meaningful conversation is fulfilling. No one likes small talk, but it can lead to a deeper connection. People actually crave to have stimulating discussions.

What Leads To An Interesting Discussion?

Discussing the weather can only get you so far. Don’t be afraid to ask someone about their goals, or their past travel experiences. You’ll be surprised at what you find out.

As long as it’s about their experiences and about the future, it’s okay to ask those types of personal questions. Getting too personal may swing the conversation in a negative direction.

Speaking about goals and expectations of the future will lead to interesting conversation. People have ideas that you may have never thought of and it’s helpful. Expanding your mind is always a good thing. You may even find a way around a challenge you’ve been dealing with.

Think Before You Speak

Some people cringe at having conversations with strangers, because some people don’t think before they speak and things get weird real quick.

If you’re uncomfortable where the conversation is going, steer it back to a safer place. Learn to change the subject, while still being respectful.

You may be that person who makes the discussion uncomfortable, so think before you speak. Your discussion should reflect the type of environment you’re in. If you’re at a school event, talk about something involving education. If you’re at a health retreat, talk about self-care or wellness.

Appreciating Great Conversation

The next time you’re waiting in the grocery line or at a conference, attempt to start a meaningful discussion. Some people are open to talking to strangers and possibly making new friends.

The art of great conversation still exists, we just need to learn how to apply it in our daily lives. Not only does it feed your mind, but it gives you confidence to be yourself in any situation.

The next time someone speaks to you, instead of giving basic answers, actively listen and get into the flow of the discussion. It could create a new avenue in your life.

#BeGoalden

Why Consistency Is Key

Consistency is key when it comes to making progress in life. The daily habits you develop play a major role in being consistent and can help with making incremental improvements over time.

Why is consistency so important? What happens if you don’t follow a certain pattern everyday? Will consistency enhance your life?

Daily Habits

We all have different daily habits that help move our day along. We perform most of these patterns unconsciously and it provides a foundation for the rest of the day.

Habits, such as brushing your teeth and taking a shower, are things you do from a necessity standpoint. If you weren’t consistent with these things, no one would want to be around you. Hygiene habits are critically important.

Other habits, such as folding your clothes or writing down your expenses, are things you choose to do to keep organized. No one has to do these, but it helps you on a personal level and allows you to promote your own development.

Consistency Has It’s Benefits

Being consistent naturally falls in line with your habits. Since you do them everyday, you’re already consistent with them.

Imagine if you didn’t brush your teeth everyday. What would happen? It definitely wouldn’t be in your best interest personally and it could lead to possible health issues. The fact that you brush your teeth consistently, is beneficial to the people around you and your health.

When folding your clothes, you are prepping for when you have to choose your outfit for the day. If you didn’t fold your clothes, you could waste time looking for something you need, as opposed to knowing where it is and putting it on right away. When you’re organized, you can focus on more important things and avoid draining your energy on the simple things.

The Power Of Consistency

Having a habit of consistency enhances your life, especially when you have productive habits.

If you exercise on a daily basis, you’ll see and feel the results throughout your body. Not only will you look good, you’ll feel good. This is a powerful habit that leads to being physically healthy, along with other advantages.

When you develop a habit and you’re consistent with it, you’re ahead of the game. Others who aren’t consistent with their good habits will have a harder time becoming more productive and won’t enjoy the perks from being consistent.

It’s a win – win situation. The more consistent you are with your good habits, the more progress you will make in your life.

The Key To Being Consistent

Don’t overwhelm your mind with how hard something is – if you do, it will seem hard and you won’t even begin.

The key to being consistent is to keep going. Start small and take action everyday. As time goes on, you will become better and it will allow you to put your mind power towards accomplishing your goals.

Consistency also helps with your confidence and puts you on another level. Because you take the time to enhance yourself on a regular basis, your confidence will rise, which prepares you for the next level of your life.

Unless you practice being consistent with the productive habits in your life, you will remain stagnant. Growth doesn’t happen where consistency is absent.

Develop some good habits and don’t allow any distractions to get in the way. You’ll soar beyond your potential when you continue to be consistent with the good, productive habits in your life.

#BeGoalden

Focus On The Lesson, Not The Pain

The only way you can think clearly and create a solution for an obstacle, is to focus on the lesson. Everything else is a distraction.

Have you ever stumbled upon a challenge and you get so caught up in why it happened, that you conveniently get stuck? Of course, you could just think of a possible solution, but it’s easier to complain about it.

The Pain

When something unexpected happens, the first thing we do is have a negative emotional reaction to it. Most of the time, we become angry and we drag it on for hours, and sometimes, days.

The obstacle you are encountering may halt progress, but having an emotional reaction halts progress even more. After a while, you begin to justify your reaction with excuses and complaining.

This leads to becoming stagnant. Days will turn into weeks, weeks will turn into months and months will turn into years. Then you’ll live with the ultimate pain – the pain of regret.

That entire process can be eliminated, if you remember one thing: focus on the lesson and find a solution.

The Lesson

No matter how bad something is, we can always find the lesson in what happened. We think that when something is in our way, or not on our side, that it’s automatically bad.

Nothing is working against you – you only perceive it that way because it didn’t go the way you planned. Obstacles are just a sign, telling you to go in another direction.

Don’t take it personal – take it as a lesson. Find the reason something happened, create a solution, and give yourself permission to move forward. Allowing your emotions to get in the way of progress will only encourage complacency and you definitely don’t want that to happen.

Your Vision

There will be obstacles and challenges from time to time, but how you respond to them will determine your level of success. It’s your responsibility to see your idea into reality.

You know the kind of results you want. To react to the little things that get in the way, is to give in to self-defeat. No one is stopping you – you’re only stopping yourself.

Instead of using your energy to behave in a negative manner, use it to improve your strategy. Anything else outside of your plan, is only a distraction.

Remain in control of your emotions, focus on the lesson and follow through with a solution. Rinse and repeat, as often as needed.

#BeGoalden

How To Persist, Without Giving Up

We think that successful people are smarter than we are. They had this genius idea, threw it out into the world and it was accepted immediately.

That’s where we’re wrong. Those that have achieved, what we call ‘the impossible,’ aren’t different from us. They are regular people who chose to be persistent.

Anybody can be successful. The only thing that holds us back is our lack of persistence and giving up.

3 Tips To Stay Persistent

Excuses are for the weak. Being persistent takes courage. There are a million reasons you can give that will keep you from starting. “I don’t have enough money,” or, “I don’t know how to do that part.” Excuses hold you back from your greatness, but if you are confident, you can work past them. It’s easy to create excuses, but it’s hard to create progress. No matter how fast or slow you are going, as long as you’re moving forward, you are improving towards a result. You won’t make it there with excuses, but you will make it, eventually, if you ignore the distractions.
Do the hard things. Of course, we would rather take the path of least resistance, but most of the time, that won’t get you far. If you have to find a needle in a haystack, start looking. Most people would automatically give up because they think it would take too long, or they don’t have time to do such tedious work, but if you don’t start, you’ll never get there. Even if the task requires you to do more than expected, do it. You want to know what separates you from the others? Doing the work! No one else is smarter or better than you, they just decided to do the hard things that other people shy away from.
Encourage yourself. Some people give up on their goals because there was no one there to keep encouraging them. This is what you wanted to do – this is your promise to yourself. It’s great when we have people in our corner to cheer us on. Sometimes, you have to be your own cheerleader. It’s not their responsibility to keep you motivated or to make sure you don’t give up. You must hold yourself accountable. There will always be someone in the crowd ready to discourage you, but there won’t always be someone there to encourage you. Use your progress as personal encouragement – you are farther along than you were the day before.

Expect Difficulties, But Don’t Give Up

The most important thing you need to know is that it will be hard. Again, it will be hard.

When we stop expecting things to come easy and deal with the obstacles as they are, growth happens. Growth creates forward movement and that’s what carries us to success.

Facing obstacles and challenges head on will give us instant clues on what to do next. It didn’t work this way? Try that way. Did it go too fast? Next time, slow it down a little. You’re perfecting your path, one obstacle at a time.

Down 9 Times, Get Up 10

In today’s society, we are living in the age of instant gratification, but achieving your goal is a process that isn’t microwaveable. Your social media feed shows you everyone’s success, but it won’t show you the time, dedication, and focus it took to get there.

Don’t be intimidated by someone else’s accomplishment – it’s just a reminder that you can do it too, as long as you remain persistent and focused. Whether it takes two months or two years, you have the ability to make it happen.

It’s exciting to put your life’s puzzle together, piece by piece. There’s no doubt that it will take some time, but we are all capable of creating our outcome. If anyone asks, just tell them you’re still working on it, but it’s all coming together.

#BeGoalden