positive Archives - The Goalden Lady

Get Rid Of Your Stinking Thinking

The way you think and talk to yourself is imperative to your growth. If your self-talk is negative, it needs to change – how you think of yourself determines how much you’ll accomplish in this world.

It’s not about mindlessly repeating affirmations everyday like clockwork, but it’s about recognizing your potential. Why live with bad thoughts when you have the freedom to live with great thoughts?

Your Past Affects How You See Yourself

It’s understandable – some of us were raised in a toxic environment where people constantly said horrible things to us. They made sure to tell you how awful and stupid you were on a regular basis. After a while, it gets stuck in your head like a broken record and you began to believe it.

Your self-esteem is affected by this nonsense. Growing up, it unconsciously became your identity and you fell in line with those types of actions. “If they say I’m bad, then I’m bad…” you’d think to yourself.

Attempting to unlearn such terrible things is a challenge. When something has been cemented into your mind, it’s like it belongs there. Your brain doesn’t want to change, but this is a habit that you must make a concentrated effort to undo.

Speak Kindly To Yourself

You have the power to be kind – why not be kind to yourself?

People place doubts in our minds and we automatically accept it. We like to believe the bad before we believe the good. It’s easier and makes for better gossip. We love telling stories of other’s failures, but we quietly overlook the stories of triumph and success.

Even if you encounter an obstacle, it’s not the end. Don’t start thinking it’s all over and there’s nothing else that can be done. Those thoughts of defeat are lying to you. The opportunity is there to prove yourself that it can be done. Take the time to think it through with a winning mind.

In that moment, you have a choice. Will you think, “It’s no use – it’ll never happen…” or, “Let me do it the other way and see what happens…”? Your entire thought pattern leads to whether you will overcome that obstacle.

What’s In Your Think Tank?

It’s so much easier to think the worst before you think the best, but that’s where the change needs to happen. It doesn’t take any physical effort – all it takes is for you to switch your words, be positive and know that you are a problem-solver.

Be the opposite of what that little voice in your head says you are. Sometimes, all it takes is a positive song that picks you up to enhance your mood. When done intentionally, affirmations can work as well.

What you need to take away from this is that you have a choice. People will say negative things to you just because, but don’t let it stick. Have a mindset so strong that you set your own rules and thrive with confidence.

Your attitude is not contingent upon what someone else says – in fact, you can adjust it. Don’t depend on someone else to see the best in you – you must know it and believe it. Stay away from the trap of other people’s opinions.

We all have the ability to think magnificent thoughts. Why choose to think the worst? Be kind to yourself, spoil yourself with positive thoughts and take actions that inspire you to level up.

#TBT: Happiness Is Your Responsibility

Your happiness is in your control. Often times, we allow outside circumstances to direct how we feel throughout the day. We have the power to feel the way we want to feel, but sometimes, we give up that responsibility to someone else.

Being happy and having the right attitude takes conscious effort. You can easily go through life thinking of unfortunate things that have happened in the past and reliving it everyday, but you also have the ability to decide to be positive and move forward.

Find Your Happiness

The reason why so many of us aren’t happy is because we are waiting on someone, or some thing, to make us happy. “I’ll be happy when I’m married – I’ll be happy when I lose 10 pounds – I’ll be happy when I finish school.” Relying on an outside source to make you feel good will fail every time.

When you wake up in the morning, give yourself permission to feel joy. Yesterday may not have been a great day, but you don’t have to invite that feeling into the next day, or the day after that. Even if you need to address the same challenge today, go into it with a positive mindset, knowing you will overcome it.

Find happiness on your own. Make the decision that this day will be productive and fulfilling, because you will make it that way. If you made the attempt and it doesn’t work out, leave it where it is – don’t carry it over into the next day. Keep a good attitude, start again and work through it with confidence.

A Good Attitude Is Rewarding

Possessing a positive attitude is more beneficial than having a bad attitude. How many times have you received poor customer service, because that person had a negative vibe?

Everyone won’t be chipper and delightful all of the time, but by having a good attitude, you remain in control of your feelings. Just because someone else isn’t having such a good day, doesn’t mean that you should give in and mirror their emotions.

Having a positive attitude lights up a room – you never know who it could affect. People with bad attitudes expect others to participate in their negativity, but you could always walk away or change the direction of the conversation.

Who wants to be around a person who’s always gloomy? Keep your attitude at a positive level and don’t let others steal your happiness.

Distractions And Discipline

Distractions are out there, fighting for your attention. It could be in the form of watching the news, people gossiping, or chasing that new, shiny object.

Whatever the situation is, don’t let your attitude follow the various distractions you encounter everyday. There are pleasant distractions that can make your day, but when it takes away your concentration, it can lead down a different road.

Distractions are a form of control. Whenever you fall for a distraction, it has power over your demeanor. There’s no way to avoid all distractions, but you still have control over how you receive and react to them.

Practice being disciplined with your attitude. When something grabs your attention, your reaction is normally to go with it. Letting distractions control your feelings can bring about anxiety and stress. Instead, acknowledge it, have your feelings about it (if necessary) and get back to your happiness. There’s no need to ruin a good day, over a small disturbance.

Happiness Takes Practice

Having a positive attitude should be common practice in your life. Don’t let other people take away the joy you want to keep.

It can be a daily battle, but it becomes easier the more you do it. By making the effort and choosing to have a brighter perspective, you open yourself up to opportunities and handle challenges more effectively.

This doesn’t mean that the bad distractions will go away, it just means that you’re in a better position to manage them – again, you have the power. When you choose to be happy, instead of allowing some outside force to hijack your emotions, you become more positive and it catches on to other people around you.

We all have a choice – are we going to guide the day, or let the day guide us?

Always keep your happiness, a good attitude and a bright perspective.

#BeGoalden

#TBT: How To Turn Procrastination Into Progress

Procrastination occurs in many ways. Some people put things off at the suggestion of others, while some are stuck being comfortable.

With the internet, most things have become easier to access. Today, you don’t need to wait for anything to happen. Delaying any type of progress is a choice that you consciously make.

With that being said, how can you stop being hesitant? Is it possible to pull yourself out of that negative vortex? When is the best time to go from procrastination to progress?

The Procrastination Trap

Change can be as difficult as you make it. Sometimes, we tend to make things harder than they really are, especially if it’s outside of our confort zone.

Instant gratification is a procrastination trap. You’re so used to having things happen instantly, you begin to think that everything should happen right now.

When you come across something that takes a little more time to come together, you become anxious. Then, you decide to leave it alone, because it’s not happening fast enough.

This leads to you procrastinating on many things, simply because it doesn’t happen right away. Realize that it takes time for some things to fall into place – all you have is time. Prepare yourself with patience and realize that everything doesn’t come about within a moment’s notice.

The Progressive Mindset

In order to make progress, it starts in your mind. Your mind is your first line of defense when it comes to obtaining information and processing it.

Your environment may be bad, your friends may be critical and your luck may not be going good, but you still have a choice. Don’t let the limitations around you affect your way of thinking.

When you think, think of positive things. Think about improving yourself, achieving that goal, having a good day, helping someone in need, or receiving good news. It may not turn out the way you think, but you learn to accept things the way they are and adjust, so you can make changes.

Progress happens when you’re able to shift your thinking and adapt to any outcome that may happen. Procrastination will hold you back from even making that first attempt, but a positive mindset will allow you to follow through and create a solution.

Procrastination Begins With Small Steps

Once you find a solution, you can begin to step into your life. As long as you don’t let procrastination stop you, you will eventually develop a productive habit.

When you get into the practice of actually starting, it’s not as hard as it seems. Begin with something small and easy to accomplish. This will have a snowball effect – the more you do it successfully, the better you can accommodate bigger tasks with confidence.

Taking small steps isn’t frightening. It’s small enough to begin, but big enough to get you going in the right direction, away from procrastination.

Outside factors can have an influence on how you move. Don’t let your environment intimidate you and don’t let small-minded people convince you to stay complacent. Starting small is better than not starting at all.

Beating Procrastination

Overcoming the habit of procrastination won’t be easy. It’s not something you can expect to happen within 24 hours. The best time to start is always NOW.

Like anything else, making progress will take time and effort to establish and maintain. There are many distractions working against you already, but as long as you don’t expect things to happen instantly, have the right mindset and take small steps, it’ll all come together.

Procrastination comes in many different forms, but you can handle it. With the right outlook, you can defeat the battle of putting things off and become more productive and dynamic with your goals.

#BeGoalden

#TBT: How To Win The Day

When we wake up in the morning, most of us act on autopilot. We go through this routine that needs to be done and we simply go about our day, hoping it will turn out well.

If you want to have a good day, you have to make it come about. Hoping and wishing will only take you so far. There are things you can do to ensure that you win your day, before it unfolds.

Think it. Go over in your mind how you want your day to go. See your meeting being successful. Envision drinking water and having a healthy lunch. Anticipate having a productive day, where you create solutions and add value to the team. By seeing it in your mind first, you will already have a head start on how things will go. Visualizing helps to guide the outcome in your favor.
Follow through. After you ‘see’ how great your day is going to be, do it. This is where the challenge lies. You can think of having an awesome day all you want, but you have to put effort behind it. It won’t happen magically. Once you think it, you must follow up with the type of actions that will create that awesome day for you. It starts in the mind, but you have to follow through and act it out to get those results.
Give compliments and be supportive of others around you. When you have a pleasant energy about you, it spreads to others. In order to make your day great, the people around you have to be in the same boat. Although you’re unable to change anyone, you can direct the process by giving them a compliment or by helping them get over a challenge. Not only does it make you feel good, it also encourages them to have a good attitude, which leads to being more productive. It’s a win-win for everyone!

As you can see, there are many ways you can improve the outcome of your day. Allowing your day to float along without any effort from you, can lead to stressful and ineffective reactions.

Take control of your day before it begins. This allows you to have a positive start towards a positive day. As you go throughout your day, remember, you are in control of how you respond.

Winning your day starts with you. By thinking it out, following through and being supportive, you can have your best day, everyday!

#BeGoalden

Improving Your Mental Environment

It’s been said that you can’t help the type of environment you were born into, but it is your fault if you stay there.

Some people are born into a negative environment. Whether it influences you mentally or physically, recognize that you have the ability to rise to a new level.

If you can fix your mental environment, eventually, your physical environment will change for the better, also.

It can be difficult to overcome pessimistic surroundings, but keep in mind, no one is coming to save you. You have to learn how to turn the negative into a positive, in order to be successful.

People in your environment may gossip, watch TV all day, or waste time worrying about things they can’t control. Give yourself a chance to exceed this type of mentality.

Just because you are around it, doesn’t mean you have to succumb to it’s negativity.

There are ways you can improve your mental environment. Here are a few recommendations:

Listen to a podcast. Nowadays, you’re not stuck listening to whatever’s playing on the radio. You can listen to any type of content that you like. There are literally thousands to choose from. Search for something that speaks to what you want to do or how you want to be. Even though there is a huge variety to choose from, don’t get caught up listening to the wrong thing. The point is to listen to words that can motivate you to live your dream.
Watch YouTube videos that strengthen your mind. Like podcasts, there are many videos you can choose from. If you’re interested in plant-based foods, there’s a beginner’s video for that. If you’re interested in learning how to integrate a certain software with another, there’s a specific video for that. There is so much to learn with YouTube videos – make it your personal video library.
Join a group. Involving yourself with a group can be encouraging and motivating. There are many select interest groups that have members where they can help you or you can help others with different challenges. You can even lurk around in the group until you feel comfortable with participating. Avoid groups where the members are negative – you want to be among like-minded individuals, who hold the same interests and goals as you do.

Escaping a bad environment is hard enough, but if you can protect your personal space with positivity, it’s very much worth the effort.

Listening to podcasts and watching videos are things you can do independently of others. No one has to know what you’re listening to or watching – it can be done without anyone volunteering their opinion.

Joining groups or masterminds involve other people. Some may be ‘know-it-alls’ or Negative Nancy’s. Don’t give in to those types – there are other people who are very helpful and can offer guidance and insight within the group. Stick with those types and ignore the others who may just want attention or be a negative leader.

Technology has provided us with so many options to be better in this day and age, the least we could do is take advantage of the best of it. If not, be prepared to be left behind in just about every aspect of life, because it is everywhere.

If you improve your mental environment, your physical environment will eventually follow suit. In today’s world, there is no excuse to not become who you are meant to be.

#BeGoalden

Make The Decision To Believe In Yourself

If you are the type of person who has no problem with believing in yourself, you’ve pretty much already won at life. For those of us who have a bit more trouble…

Are you aware of this massive power that you have in your possession? Everyday when you wake up, you can decide to be as courageous or as cowardly as you want to be.

Some of us allow outside influences to make that decision for us, so we just go with the flow. Whatever happens, happens.

There are others of us who make that decision every single day and we choose to be as happy and confident as we want to be. Nothing’s going to bring us down — we can handle it!

Why can’t we all be that way?

We are all born into different environments. Some grew up in a loving, forward-thinking home and others grew up in a negative, stagnant way of thinking home.

When your surroundings are positive and motivating, it’s easy to believe in yourself. Everyone is always rooting for you and they acknowledge your efforts.

When your surroundings are negative, there is no acknowledgement for anything. Everyone is stuck in the same place, with the ‘it’s always been like this,’ mentality. The possibility of doing any better is nonexistent.

Although your environment doesn’t determine your outcome 100%, it does play a major part.

It’s hard to go against the grain in a bad environment. The easy way out would be to accept what everyone else is doing and continue to ‘go with it.’

The harder thing to do is be proactive. Even when people say negative things to you 20 times a day, you find a way to turn it around.

“I won’t give in.”
“I can break the cycle.”
“I can do better than this.”
“I don’t want to end up like them.”

This is what pushes you ahead. Although they keep telling you that you’re no better than them, you believe that you are and you can do better.

On the other hand, some people believe in themselves so much, they abuse it and think they can do whatever they want.

When you become used to things turning out in your favor, your efforts can become lazy. You don’t stop after success happens — you have to put in even more effort to keep it going.

As you can see, your environment can work for you or against you. Some people want to break out of their negative environment so bad, they do the total opposite of what’s around them.

Others come from such a positive environment, they expect people to believe in them everywhere they go. When they come across a set of people who really don’t care, they become depressed and fall into a trap of believing what others say about them.

These scenarios don’t happen with everyone, but again, the environment does have an effect on a person’s self-belief.

Let’s teach our children to believe in themselves, no matter what others say or think about them. Teach them that everyone is not going to be encouraging of everything they do. Some people will tease them just to get under their skin.

Most of all, teach them that their self worth is not determined by what others think. Believing in yourself can be difficult, but with the right foundation and mindset, we can push ourselves farther than our thoughts can take us.

Just make that decision every morning. I am courageous. I am beautiful. I am helpful. I am worthy. I am powerful.

Don’t wait for permission (you don’t need it) or for somebody else to tell you (you know it better than they know it). Believe it!

#BeGoalden

As published on Medium.com.

Participate In Your Life

Show up. Jump in. Fall down and get back up again.

It’s amazing the number of people who watch their life pass them by. Opportunities present themselves and they just won’t budge.

Why are you here? You get upset when someone wastes your time, but you won’t even be proactive in the life you live.

It’s your life!

You are the director and the star! You have creative control over what direction you want your movie to go in.

It’s not supposed to happen to you, you are supposed to make it happen!

Don’t let other people determine the end of your story. You can’t blame anyone but yourself if it doesn’t turn out the way you want it to.

This is all on you. Yes, it will be challenging. You will want to quit. You will see other people succeed before you. They are not your concern. That is not your movie.

Fight the negative chatter in your head. Replace it with positive affirmations. Keep moving forward. This is how you create your own outcome.

When you get a chance to do something positive, do it. That chance could turn into an opportunity to push you forward even more. Don’t get to the end of your life and wonder what would have happened if you did it. Do it so you’ll know what happens.

Make the necessary moves you need to make. Mom and Dad can only guide you so far. You must enhance your ability to grow and that only happens when you take action.

Participate in your life. It was made for you to design. Don’t hold back – do everything you wish you could do. Don’t let it pass you by.

You only get one. Make your dream come true.