When life happens, how does it affect you? Do you shut down for days at a time? Do you carry the emotions with you? Do you work through the pain? These are normal responses for anyone to have. There are different levels of pain, but the important thing is knowing how to handle it and moving on with your life.
You can think to yourself, “Why is this happening to me?”, but the truth is, it happens to everyone in some shape or form. You’re not the only one that experiences hurt and tragedy. Some people react by holding on to the pain, but they don’t realize that they’re only hurting themselves.
When you hold on to sadness, guilt, jealousy, or any type of pain, you are hurting yourself. You are the one carrying those negative feelings with you, day in and day out. It’s like a weight that never leaves because, for some reason, you insist on giving those feelings a home. Negative feelings do not deserve a space in your life. We must let them go, so we can move on to better things.
Another reason people may carry negative emotions is because it’s simply someone else’s fault. They did you wrong and you want them to apologize or admit to it. Yes, it’s the principle of the situation that matters, but moving on matters, too. You can sit and wait all day for someone’s apology, no matter how wrong they did you, and you will get nothing. If they decide to apologize, more than likely, it’s not heartfelt, because you had to make them do it. You don’t need other people’s permission to move on. Hearing the words “I’m sorry,” is not going to make you a better person than you were yesterday. Some of us need closure, but life still goes on whether you get that closure or not.
Learning to forgive others can free you of the weight of negative emotions. I was in a situation where someone I knew used my name for credit purposes. There were all kinds of collection agencies calling me and my family, asking to pay back money that I never used. I was mad at that person for at least three years. Being mad took away my joy. Every time I saw this person, she would be laughing like everything in her life was all good, which made me more mad. I would go to bed thinking of how she did me wrong. It consumed me so much, those negative feelings began to come out of me and I would act out towards other people. One night, I woke up and decided that I couldn’t let this feeling rob me any longer. I forgave her for what she did and the pain she caused me. I felt such relief, like I could breathe again. Tons of weight lifted off of my shoulders and I couldn’t believe how much better I felt!
Forgiveness is for you, not for the other person who hurt you. Like me, you could be walking around with that pain all day and night and it will steal your life away from you. When you forgive someone, it releases those negative emotions and bad feelings that you’ve been holding on to. Forgiveness gives you the opportunity to let it go and to move on with your life. You won’t ever forget about what happened, but forgiving is a way to move forward and live your life.
Whatever happened may have hurt unbelievably bad, but please don’t allow it to control the rest of your life. The chance for you to move past the pain is there and it’s called forgiveness. It is hard to do, but you don’t want to wake up and discover that it has taken three years away from your life. Don’t hurt too long, forgive with a sincere heart, and move forward, for your own sake.