just do it Archives - The Goalden Lady

Mastering The Art of The Start

Getting ready to start can be a hindering activity. There are so many plans and research that goes into making it perfect, sometimes, the idea may not actually come into existence.

They say the start is always the hardest part. It can be, but if you look at starting from a different perspective, it can be productive, just as it should be.

Thinking Ahead Of Time

We often think too far ahead when we come up with our bright ideas. It’s great to think forward, but you must think forward productively.

It doesn’t help when you overthink. “What if this doesn’t work out – who’s going to help me – how long will it take me to do this?” All of these thoughts are self-defeating. They only promote procrastination and fear.

What happens when procrastination and fear become involved? Absolutely nothing. Every little fear you have contributes to the delay of your idea. It’s a comfortable place to be, but you must avoid hesitating, as this becomes a bad habit that becomes difficult to break.

Doing the opposite will save you more time and mental energy. Upon thinking of your idea, develop the habit of taking some sort of action towards it. Of course, you won’t complete the entire project in one hour, but do something to get you going in the right direction. Taking immediate action allows you to build your ambition muscle.

Excuses, Excuses

Most of the time, it’s best to keep your ideas to yourself. Unless you’re surrounded with a supportive environment, it’s best to move in silence.

As soon as you share your thoughts about your goals, most people will automatically shoot it down. They’ll say negative things like, “You can’t do that – that won’t work – who do you think you are?”

This is why you must be careful of who you have in your inner circle. People will say negative things and give you excuses all day long, just to make themselves feel better. It’s as if they’re saying, “I can’t do it, so you can’t either.”

Don’t allow yourself to become trapped in that box. It’s an easy practice to pick up – before you know it, you’re saying it to yourself and others.

As corny as repeating affirmations may sound, it’s a valuable habit. Others around you are calling you names and constantly telling you what you can’t do, but affirmations provide the foundation of accomplishing what you can do.

Words can be powerful. Start replacing those easy excuses with positive affirmations – see how your thoughts and actions increase towards success.

You Are In Control

When you make a decision to start, you’re in control. You’ve made the decision to begin a new project and you will see it through. What happens during the process can sometimes be out of your control.

This is where overthinking and excuses comes in and destroys your efforts. You may not control how it goes after you start, how far it will take you or who sees it, but you won’t regret making the attempt. Planning helps, but be able to adapt and adjust. Get in the habit of starting without expecting perfection.

Yes, we should have high standards and work towards being successful, but also realize that it’s more about building yourself in the process – the results will come. Too many people get caught up in their emotions because it didn’t turn out the way they wanted, so they give up.

The fact is, you started and did your best. If it doesn’t turn out in your favor, do it again – now, you have constructive feedback and an improved strategy to go on. As long as you start, your skills will continue to develop and get better. No one gets it right the very first time, so get over it and keep going.

Start Starting

Have you ever looked back in your life and wished you would have started something? That’s what you don’t want to happen. Regret is one of the biggest disappointments you can live with. It can be avoided, but you must start and continue to start.

Understand that the journey is what builds you. Everything from your level of discipline, focus, persistence, determination, resilience, consistency, work ethic – it all comes from constantly starting. Your idea can only advance through improvement.

The achievement will come, but first, you must master the art of the start.

#TBT: Live Your Life Today

Whatever it is you want to accomplish in your life, do it. There may not be much time for you to contemplate.

Everyday is a chance to do what you want to do and make progress. Even if it is uncomfortable, the opportunity is there for the taking.

We think so far into the future, that we forget to do something today. Overthinking takes over our mental space and we end up doing nothing. Planning is essential, but starting is just as important.

If you knew what day would be your last, you would do everything you want to do, within that amount of time, especially if it was soon. That’s what makes time so precious because we don’t know how much of it we have left.

And that’s the catch – you don’t know when your last day is. Therefore, you must do your best today, as if tomorrow may not come.

So what if you mess up? So what if it didn’t turn out right? So what if only one person showed up? How many times are you going to let an outside force, stop you from reaching your goal?

The trolls, the gossip, the weird stares – none of that matters in the end. Don’t waste time thinking about that insult. Stop saying ‘yes’ to situations that allow you to float through life. Hold yourself accountable and do what you want to do. No one can live your dream the way you can because your dream is in your control.

We think so small of ourselves and give so much consideration and power to what other people think. Instead of praising others, praise yourself. Stop thinking that other people are always successful, you are successful, too! Stop thinking that good things only happen to other people, good things happen to you, too!

None of us are any better than the other – we are all human and we all have the ability to do something great. Some of us leave it up to other people to be great, but the capability is there. You just have to get up and do the work that it takes to be great.

Don’t let your time run out without making your mark. Put forth phenomenal effort daily. Regret is a painful feeling that no one should have to experience. The only way not to, is to live your life, everyday.

#BeGoalden

#TBT: You Don’t Have To Like It (Just Do It)

You’re ready to start committing to your goal. You’ve done all of the research and you know what it’s going to take. The plan has been thought out and you’re prepared. The start date comes around and you realize that you’re not feeling it. It looked good during research, but now it’s time to do the actual work.

When people say they want to reach a certain goal, they mostly think about the parts they like to do. This can be fun and it’s part of the reason why you want to do it, right? Everyone says, “Follow your passion! Do what you love!” That’s called a hobby. If you want to make a living off of what you love to do, it’s called a business.

Now, you have to do business things. It doesn’t seem so fun anymore. You can only get paid under the table for so long. You will run into someone who will ask you to fill out an I-9 or W-9 for whatever type of tax or identification purposes*. Now, you need to temporarily stop baking cupcakes and start doing the paperwork necessary to make your business official.

Yes, I know you hate paperwork and filling out different forms and making payments to cover your business name with the state, etc. Well, you don’t have to like it, you just have to do it. While you’re baking those lovely cupcakes, you also have to make time for the things you need to do to make your business grow and to generate more customers. You can pay someone to do these things for you or you can take the time and do it yourself. I know it’s laborious, but you should always aim to have all of your ducks in a row.

You just learned that you need a license in order to bake those lovely cupcakes you’ve been baking for the last ten years. You already know how to do this, so why do you need a license? Well, it’s the law (for example purposes). If you get a surprise inspection one day, you’ll be glad you did it. Get your lovely cupcake baking license and keep moving forward. Want to be recognized as a woman-owned business? That’s a task – you’ll need the last three years of taxes, articles of organization, the date your business started, meeting minutes, NAICS codes, etc*. Ask anyone in a legal business and they will tell you that there’s much more to running a business, other than doing the part you love.

It sucks that these things come up, but don’t let it ruin your passion for those cupcakes. There are many other things you will have to do, just so you can bake those lovely cupcakes. As your business grows, you’ll be able to hire someone to help you with the boring, tedious paperwork. Again, you don’t have to like all of the exhausting, monotonous work, but you have to do it. Don’t let it stop you from starting your business. Everyone has to do it – no one is picking on you. If it’s needed, then do it. Plain and simple. The complaining and whining will only hinder your progress.

One more time: you don’t have to like it, you just have to do it. If it was easy, everyone would be successful.

*The examples in this post are merely used as a guideline in starting a fictitious cupcake business. Please do your own research in order to succeed.

Take Action, But Don’t Get Stuck On The Research

Take Action, Get It Wrong And Do It Again

The first step to taking action, for some, is doing research. There are lots of questions concerning how to get started and if it interests you enough to put in the time and effort.

It only makes sense to do some reading and asking around before you begin, but what happens when it turns into procrastination? Is there ever a right time to start?

Action Is A Verb. Be A Verb.

Let’s not make this harder than what it really is. Yes, research is designed to help you make informed decisions and to create strategic plans moving forward, but other than that, what’s stopping you?

We come up with all kinds of excuses: it’s too hot, my head hurts, I don’t have time, I’ll do it Monday, the stock market is down, it shouldn’t have happened that way, and so on.

It’s very easy to provide excuses, but what about taking action? No matter how much research you do, the wheels won’t start turning until you actually do something. Do not paralyze your actions by overthinking – simply move and adjust.

Don’t Ask For Action, Take It!

After you announce your goal, people will follow up to see if you’re following through. Did you think you would announce that you would take over the world and no one would ask about it later?

If you’re bold enough to put it out there, be bold enough to do it. We have these great ideas, yet, we never get around to them. An invisible fear creeps in and floods our imagination with all kinds of negativity and distractions.

All of a sudden, you’ve created a thousand reasons why your great idea was really a terrible idea. Others have talked you out of it by voicing their unsolicited opinions.

You do not need anyone’s permission. Don’t wait for the world’s approval, or you’ll be waiting forever. Hold yourself accountable and take responsibility for the results. The best thing about it is, you can always go back and do it better, no matter how many times you fail (which is only learning).

Do You Hide Behind Research?

Yes, a little research is sometimes needed before you dive into something. You want to know what you’re getting into and what it takes to become successful at it. At some point, you must go and do.

Some of us get stuck in the research phase. It’s comfortable because no one is expecting anything from us and we don’t have to face rejection. We feel safe from potential challenges and obstacles when we’re constantly ‘getting ready’.

Nothing happens when you continuously research. You may gain more knowledge and discover different routes to achieve your goal, but nothing happens. If nothing happens, nothing happens. It’s just that simple.

Go ahead and do your research, but do it and start. Don’t get stuck there forever – put some actionable force behind it. Instead of worrying about being perfect, be productive.

Stop Getting Ready And Just Do It!

The only way you’ll get there is if you take action. Understand that it may not be right the first or second time, but that’s how you improve and do better.

Step out of the ‘getting ready’ phase and step into the ‘now what’ phase. After you take action, think, ‘now what’? What can I do next? Can I make it better? How can I get closer to the outcome?

Success requires action, not constant procrastination through endless research. Don’t be your own worst enemy. If you take that first step and keep going, the fear will go away. The time will never be right, but the right time is now.

#BeGoalden

Throwback Thursday: Shift And Move

Have you ever been in traffic and you see a sign that says “Traffic Delays Ahead”? For most people, it’s frustrating because it means construction delays and detours. Now they have to find another way to get to their destination and it will throw off their estimated time of arrival. I’m sure the construction people don’t mean to slow up your day (or weeks), but it has to be done for everyone’s safety and benefit. There’s no other way around it, but to dig in and start.

After they are finished repairing the road (days or weeks later), everyone’s happy that they did what needed to be done. The road drives better and traffic is more efficient.

This is what happens when you are on your way to achieving your goal and doing your work. Things you didn’t expect to happen will come up and you have to deal with it. Most people would stop and not take a second look at what needs to be done to get around the problem. There will be times when you have to take a look at what happened, figure out how to move forward, and continue on. What’s the worst that could happen? You may lose a little time and patience, but if it’s necessary to move forward, then do it. Challenges will arise, but you must have the attitude and confidence to handle it. Try not to get so caught up with the problem, but push for a solution. Sometimes, a pivot is needed in order to keep moving.

Don’t be discouraged if your plan isn’t going the way you thought it would go. One of the characteristics of a Goalden Lady is knowing when to shift and move. When you thought you were going left, you find out you need to turn right. It may cause a slight panic because it was unexpected, but making that turn and moving on shows that you’re flexible and can handle any challenge that presents itself. Sometimes, a change is needed to make things better.

When you look back on those obstacles that tried to derail you, you’ll be proud that you hung in there and faced it head on. You will come out on the other end a stronger person! Even if the outcome was bad, it’s a lesson learned and you won’t make that mistake again. Every obstacle has a lesson (good or bad), because you learn what to do and what NOT to do. Use it to your advantage to become better – it will benefit you in the long run.

The construction people don’t come up with excuses when they do their job – they get right to it, so they can finish and move on (because it is their job). When you come across a challenge, don’t make an excuse – figure it out, dig in, and keep moving (because it is your work).

#BeGoalden

You Know What To Do, So What’s The Hold Up?

Why do we have to trick ourselves into building habits and reaching our goals? There’s a hack for almost everything, but deep down inside, you know you can do it without all of the bells and whistles.

Our ancestors didn’t need hacks to do anything. It was a matter of life or death and they just did it. Have we become so lazy that we need incentives and tricks to force us to do everything?

Making The Right Decision

You know what you need to do. Making it pretty and convincing shouldn’t keep you from achieving the end result. Stop looking for ways to make it easier and just do it.

If you know you need to lose weight, lose it. There’s really no need to join a weight program. Some people do it for the social aspect of it, but essentially, you can lose weigh on your own.

We’ve become soft. We want someone to hold our hands and tell us that everything will work out and be okay. We want someone to tell us how proud they are of us for showing up 3 days in a row.

Ultimately, you make the decision to lose the weight. It’s nice to have a partner who is holding you accountable, but it’s not necessary. In most cases, it only makes you more dependable on them and not yourself.

It Doesn’t Need To Be Pretty And Right

So what if you did it wrong? As long as you’re still breathing, you have another chance to do better.

Taking action beats perfection. Perfection is a form of procrastination and it will keep you in the same place for long periods of time.

It’s like when you are writing and you’re afraid to hit publish. Why? Because you’re scared of what others will think and say. It doesn’t ‘feel’ right.

You don’t need to go through a 12 step program in order to hit the publish button. Yes, it’s scary, but what’s the worst thing that could happen? You never know who will gain value from reading what you wrote. Even if you gain a couple of trolls, that just means you’re doing it right because they’re paying attention.

You Already Know What To Do

Whatever it is you need to do, you already know the steps to accomplish it. The challenge is in your mind and starting.

Continuing with the weight example, you know the consequences of not eating healthy. For some reason though, you feel you need a pretty little app to get started and a weekly group to report to.

Have faith in yourself – you already know what to do! Stop overthinking and depending on other little gadgets and groups to pull you through. Don’t make it hard on yourself. There’s no need to pay $50 a month for someone to tell you something that you already know how to do.

It’s All On You

In the end, it’s all on you and the actions you decide to take. In your heart of hearts, you know what needs to be done, but your mind has to make the connection to the activity, in order to achieve the result.

We encounter many distractions and it’s difficult to find our own thoughts and think for ourselves. It’s easy to go along with someone else’s idea, but what about your idea? What do you think?

It’s nice to have an accountability partner and join groups that help us get to the next level. Having that support can make things easier to handle and accomplish, but it holds you back when you begin to depend on it to reach your goals.

It’s Like Riding A Bike

When you learn to ride a bike, there’s someone there to guide you and hold your seat so you won’t fall. Once you gain your confidence, they let go and you can ride on your own. Even if you fall every now and then, you know how to get back on and ride again. There’s no need for them to hold your seat again, because you know what to do.

Later in life, when you’re older, do you look for that person to hold your seat? No, because you know how to do it on your own. You can have bike buddies who ride along with you, but you are also capable of riding by yourself.

It’s the same with life. There are times when we need guidance and for someone to show us how it’s done, but when you learn it, you can go on by yourself without needing and depending on them all the time.

You don’t need other people like you think you do. Bet on yourself. You can do this. You’ll be surprised at the great amount of progress you can make independently.

Today, choose one thing that you will do by yourself, without relying on someone else. You know what to do – do it and make progress with your life.

#BeGoalden

Get Out of That Rut By Doing Your Part

Participating in something new can be exciting. You’re all fired up and you expect nothing but the best to happen.

In your mind, you’re thinking, “This is great! It’s going to change everything for me!”

Once you get the information and it’s time to do your part to make things happen, your excitement starts to fade. Eventually, it didn’t turn out the way you wanted. Your life is still the same.

Other people and things can only help you so much. It happens a lot, where people are expecting a ‘magic pill’ and nothing happens.

For example – you attend a real estate seminar that says you can make $10,000 in one month. The ‘guru’ shows you how it’s done.

When you go home, you look at the material.

A month has passed by and you think, “This was a scam. It didn’t even work.”

On the other hand, take a look at what happened. Did you follow through or are you disgruntled because it wasn’t as easy as you thought it would be?

If you honestly put in the effort, you can call it what you want to call it. If the only thing you did was let the material collect dust, you can’t say anything because you didn’t make a true attempt.

Don’t resort to being negative just because you didn’t do the work. Nothing is done for you. You can get help and support, but it’s still up to you to follow through on your end.

Using excuses is taking the lazy way out. Now you’re stuck in an emotional rut and everything stinks.

There is no ‘magic pill.’ There is no ‘hack.’

Your life is based upon your effort. You can only control what you do. Other people can give you suggestions and advice, but ultimately, you are the deciding factor of your success.

Life kicks everyone down. We’ve all lost money, we’ve all had a tough break, we’ve all had unexpected things happen.

It’s hard to think on the bright side of things when you’re going through it. Even when you think you’re failing, you have to do your part. Stop playing the victim and start finding your way.

Here are a few ideas to help get out of that rut:

Take 15 minutes. You can’t be mad forever, but you can be mad for 15 minutes. Get it out of your system for 15 minutes – shout, cry, throw something, whatever it is. Just do it for 15 minutes. After that, you have to get back to figuring out your next move.
Listen to that song. Everyone has that one song that makes you feel on top of the world. It gives you energy and makes you feel unstoppable.
Move. After listening to that song, it’ll make you want to move. Go for a walk, lift some weights, run – just go outside and move. When you move, you feel better.
Help somebody. Being helpful to someone can make their day. In return, it makes your day. Whether you volunteer at a homeless shelter or help someone with their groceries, you’ve made a contribution to the goodness of the world.

Even though it can feel like it, you’re not the only one going through something. Don’t get stuck in that rut, or else you’ll become that negative person that no one wants to be around.

Everyday is a chance to do better. It may not get better all at once, but it’s those little everyday fights that win the big battle over time.