As you grow into the Goalden Lady (or person) you aspire to be, you will come across many people. Some people are good for you, some are not. The important thing is to know who you are and know what you want. You can’t work on other people (even though you may try), but you can definitely work on yourself.
Know who you are. This means you need to know your standards, your expectations, what disappoints you, what makes you fly, and what makes you stop in your tracks. These are just a few examples, but I’m sure you understand. If you don’t know what you basically like and dislike, you will be taken advantage of. Do you like to read? Do you like to go fishing? Do you only like red gummy worms? The serious and the silly things are all you, and you need to know them. You can’t expect someone to get to know the real you, if you don’t know yourself.
This leads to developing relationships, whether they’re friendships, courtships (old-school), or enemies. When you grow a relationship, it normally starts out with you getting to know each other’s hobbies, likes and dislikes, favorite TV shows, etc. Some people you will attract and some people you will reject. The whole point is to know yourself, so that you know what you like. The relationship will have a better foundation to build upon. This is where the topic comes in.
I know you probably thought that this post was going to be about knowing yourself. It is, but there’s a simple piece of advice to go along with it. Always have something to do. When you come into these relationships with other people, there will be times where you can’t stand each other or you’re mad. This can eat you to your core, because we all know that you’re sitting there, wasting time, being mad (or insert another similar emotion here), and that leads to no where. Have something to do. It could be putting a puzzle together, reading a book, or anything that you do on a constant basis that you enjoy. At least you’ll be getting something done, while you’re mad. It also takes your mind off of what you’re mad about and may give you another perspective on what you’re mad about.
Another reason why you should always have something to do, is to allow yourself to move on. Sitting there, thinking about this person, what they’re doing, and being hurt, is not good. Don’t be dependent on someone else that way. This can turn into stalker-ish behavior, because you have nothing to do. That’s not good. You should never ever put yourself in that position to depend on someone else’s company or friendship. You hear people say, “I’ll die without you” all because they had nothing else to do. Both parties should always have something to do. If the other person is busy, and you aren’t doing anything, you become an emotional nag. No one likes a nag. So find something to do.
As small as this sounds, it will get you through some rough times. It’s better than sitting there all day, crying, listening to sad songs, and trying to figure out why. By doing something, it won’t take the pain away, but it will be a bit more bearable. Your mind can focus on something more creative and less emotional. By doing something constructive, it allows you to move on from the situation, although you won’t forget and it will probably come up later. Don’t torture yourself that way. Within that amount of time, you could have cut the grass, produced a song, or exercised beyond your normal threshold, among other things. Having something to do will at least improve you, but doing nothing won’t improve anything. Drink some water, and please – don’t be that person. Always have something to do.