We’ve all done it at some point in our lives – diminishing our ideas and beliefs before anyone else can.
It makes you think you’re escaping the ridicule of others before they have a chance to do it. The idea of, “If I don’t do it, I won’t get hurt,” only leads to a path of self-sabotage and defeat.
Self-defeat is when you deny yourself of potential positive outcomes. You think it won’t happen anyway, so why even try? You don’t want to experience losing or having hurt feelings, so you run away from opportunity and beat yourself up.
First, let’s get over the idea of getting your feelings hurt. It’s going to happen. We’ve all had hurt feelings before, but we find a way to get past it. It doesn’t stop after you get old, so start dealing with it now.
The only way to deal with it is to go through it. Learn to develop a habit of persistence. Every time an obstacle occurs, don’t allow it to hijack your plan – be resourceful, figure it out and act. The next time it happens, you’ll know how to handle it and move on.
Putting yourself down only makes you weak and less confident. You need all of the confidence you can build up. Having a healthy self-esteem prepares you for those moments of uncertainty.
Secondly, don’t be your own worst enemy. There are other people who already do that. They try to insult you because you’re at least making an effort. It’s their insecurities – they don’t have a strong mindset to do the things they really want to do, so they try to push that same belief onto you.
Don’t let those types of thoughts enter your mind, because then, you begin to sabotage your own beliefs about yourself. You become your own worst enemy. You’ve done the enemy’s job for them.
Don’t let the enemy win!
At this point, no one has to do it to you, because you’re doing it to yourself. You disrespect yourself by believing what they say. You’ve placed limits on your own abilities, just to escape what they might say or ‘think.’
Who cares what they say or what they think? The only person in this world that knows exactly what you can do, is you. It’s not your parents, your siblings, your girlfriend/boyfriend – no, only you really know how far you can go. It’s in your control.
Stop listening to what other people tell you and listen to yourself. Tell yourself how awesome and strong you are!
Now, believe it. Don’t allow anyone else to take over your mind and bend it to what they like. Don’t worry about disappointing others, worry about disappointing yourself.
It’s great if you have an encouraging environment of people who trust and believe in you, but it comes down to you believing when no one else is there. Your cheerleaders won’t always be with you everywhere you go, so you have to learn to be your own cheerleader and follow through.
Don’t stop your progress before it starts. If there’s a wide open, 2 mile road ahead of you, why would you stop after taking 2 steps? This is where your self-defeat comes in:
- Who do you think you are?
- You’ll only make it halfway…
- It’s too far…
- Am I getting a prize for this?
All kinds of things will pop into your mind, but you must learn to stretch yourself. So what, if no one is there to see you do it? Do it for yourself! Do it for the benefit of knowing! This is how you build yourself. Stopping yourself before you start only makes you like everyone else.
You’re not everyone else. Find what you are interested in and go after it. Learn it, do it, make mistakes, do it again, create a better plan, follow it, fall down, get back up…that’s how it works.
It’s not a waste of time. It’s called progress and progress leads to success. Don’t sabotage yourself into a life of mediocrity and regret. Let your light shine!
#BeGoalden